


Where Will You Be When This Is Through? (N7 month prompts)

by AricaZorel



Series: All or Nothing [3]
Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Companion Piece, Complicated Relationships, F/M, Language, N7 Day, n7 month prompts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:07:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 32,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27336901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AricaZorel/pseuds/AricaZorel
Summary: A series of prompts that feature Kaidan Alenko and Kora Reese through the course of their lives leading up to and including the events of Mass Effect 3.For N7 month 2020, I've decided to feature parts of Kaidan and Kori's story not directly addressed by Messages or Broken Road. These prompts will take place during both stories but also feature moments in their pasts. I hope these prompts help flesh out their characters, their relationship, and what important events from their pasts helped to shape them into the people they are during ME3. Plus I just want an excuse to write them more ;)
Relationships: Kaidan Alenko/Original Character(s), Kaidan Alenko/Original Female Character(s)
Series: All or Nothing [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1848730





	1. Red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reese could do no less. She owed it to all those who had passed on and all those that still needed someone to fight for them. She could be that person. The person who had stood for her and still did. She would wear the red stripe and she would make him proud.

**_Set during chapter 19 of Broken Road_ **

**_Sunday, December 17, 2186_ **

Lt. Commander Kora Reese ran her fingers over the red stripe that was now featured prominently on the right sleeve of her armor. She sat on the bench near the armory lockers aboard the Normandy while it was docked at the Citadel undergoing repairs and upgrades. They were supposed to be on shore leave as ordered by Hackett, but nothing was ever normal for those assigned to the SR2. The crew of the Normandy actually doing something other than fighting Reapers and everyone else’s battles…That was defiantly a change.

All that became background noise as she focused on the armor Shepard had given her just minutes before. He’d called her to the cargo bay of the Normandy after receiving a similar message from Hackett as she had. The SR2’s first officer was to be promoted to the status of N7 immediately and given all the rights and responsibilities thereof. She’d found out that Vega had been paired with Shepard as a mentorship for the N7 program since the traditional schooling was not possible at the moment.

She was happy for the Lt. He deserved it. Shepard was an amazing mentor not just because he was an N7 and captain of the Normandy but because he was Shepard. The man under all the armor and the titles and accolades was one of the best people she had ever known. And somehow nearly 4 years ago, he’d seen something in her—something Anderson and Alenko had seen. Something that compelled him to give her a chance to prove she belonged on the SR1 and now she was his first officer on the SR2.

Reese’s eyes flickered to the N7 emblazed on the chest plate of her new set of armor. After everything, all the losses, all the screwups, all the anger she’d held onto, all the near misses, all the reports on her file, she was an N7. It seemed surreal. She had looked up to Shepard when she’d been on the SR1. But before that, she’d looked up to the original N7, David Anderson, himself. For everything Anderson had done and still continued to do, he had always found time to check in on her.

He had been responsible for her assignment to the SR1 in the first place. She been tasked with helping reverse engineer Turian technology to make the Normandy. Anderson recommended her for that and then kept her on during the shakedown cruise. He had talked her into staying instead of returning to R & D. It was an argument held behind closed doors and one she knew he would win because he was right.

She had been hiding since being demoted for insubordination. She was better than that and her posting on the SR1 was a chance to prove that to others but more importantly to herself. He had always pushed her to do better with either a vid call, an email, or a visit when his schedule permitted. He was the reason she’d considered rejoining the SpecOps program after the original Normandy went down. Eventually he recommended her for the N7 program. She owed him. They all did.

Anderson was on Earth. _Voluntarily_. He could have left with Shepard and the Normandy and coordinated things from the Citadel or the SR2 itself. Instead he did what he knew he had to do. He had the experience, the knowledge, and the grit to get the hard jobs done. The original N7 would lead from the front not from behind. He was a legend amongst the Alliance. If anyone could lead the fight on Earth, it was David Anderson. She could do no less than follow his example.

The red stripe of an N7 had never truly ever been something she thought she would see on her own armor. Joining the Alliance military hadn’t been about being the best soldier or the best superior officer or even the best anything. It had been about doing something positive with all the negative she had experienced. Using her talents and abilities to help others so they would not have to suffer the same loss as she. It had been at one point about gaining revenge on those that had taken her family from her.

Reese had quickly realized there was no place for vengeance in an organization that was devoted to protecting others. Instead her worldview changed. Yes she was still angry. Yes she was still suffering from a traumatic loss. Yes she still wanted to make those responsible pay. But as time passed she realized she could help more by developing contacts, doing research, involving herself in assignments that would strength the Alliance and better prepare them for protecting against the threats from within and without.

Her life had been shattered nearly 20 years before by people who thought they were providing a future for humanity by doing whatever was necessary to advance them to their fullest potential. The humans lost in those endeavors were simply collateral damage for the greater good of humanity. Conatix. Biotic extremists. Anti-biotics groups. Pro-human groups. Cerberus. They all claimed to be different but weren’t. They all believed there could only be one way to live, to have a future. Their way

They were wrong. One man had shown her that. The first N7. The first man to wear the red stripe. He had been the one to respond to the distress signal from her colony and been the one to take a chance that the surviving teenagers exposed to a super high dose of eezo were not a danger.

She would wear the red stripe for him. For his belief in her. For his belief in humanity. For his belief that every species deserved to live. For his faith that Shepard and the Normandy would find a way to win.

She could do no less. She owed it to all those who had passed on and all those that still needed someone to fight for them. She could be that person. The person who had stood for her and still did. She would wear the red stripe and she would make him proud.


	2. Science

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So, Kaidan, I’ve never had the nerve to ask…The hair, man? Is that product or are you just naturally that uh…whatever that is,” Joker asked.
> 
> “Actually its because of static electricity. Biotics build up a static charge the same way a ship does during FTL. The L3 implants minimize the effects, but with the L2s, it can be pretty painful.”
> 
> “Wow. I was just screwing with you. Now I’m that asshole.”
> 
> “Yeah, you are that asshole,” Reese muttered as she took a swig of her beer.
> 
> Joker glanced up at her. “Hey! I’m sorry! I didn’t know! Kaidan straightened me out, okay?”

_**Set during Broken Road Chapter 23** _

__

_**Saturday, December 23, 2186, Commander Shepard’s Apartment, Silversun Strip, Citadel** _

It was intended as a joke. She knew that. But that’s not at all how she took it. Of course the target of the joke took it much better. He always had and probably always would. Kaidan Alenko was just like that. Kora Reese was not.

She watched from where she had perched herself on the back of the couch behind Kaidan as Joker asked a question simply meant to tease, not harm. Her fiancé had heard it a thousand times before and gave off a disinterested response. It was a simple explanation he had given dozens of times.

“So, Kaidan, I’ve never had the nerve to ask…The hair, man? Is that product or are you just naturally that uh…whatever that is,” Joker asked.

“Actually its because of static electricity. Biotics build up a static charge the same way a ship does during FTL. The L3 implants minimize the effects, but with the L2s, it can be pretty painful.”

“Wow. I was just screwing with you. Now I’m _that_ asshole.”

“Yeah, you are that asshole,” Reese muttered as she took a swig of her beer.

Joker glanced up at her. “Hey! I’m sorry! I didn’t know! Kaidan straightened me out, okay?”

She huffed as Kaidan turned towards her. “He didn’t know, Kori. It’s not like biotics advertise the nuances of our abilities or what other things are involved.”

“It doesn’t matter. You’ve know each other for years. Joker’s served with a dozen biotics now…Wouldn’t the thought cross your mind that maybe biotics involved _more_ than throwing people across the room?”

“I thought you liked throwing people across the room?” Joker muttered.

“Would you like me to demonstrate that on you?” Reese snapped back as she stood up.

“Hey! Whoa there! We don’t need any of that,” Alenko ordered standing up between them, hands held out towards Reese, know full well what to expect when her temper flared. “It was an innocent mistake, Kori.”

“Yeah, well, maybe people need to be more educated about the science behind biotics. It’s not like human biotics are new. First gen biotics are having kids now…”

“Look, all I know is not to piss you off and that both of you had a hell of a childhood as first gen biotics. I get that it sucked but you are pioneering way for the next generation to learn better,” Joker offered. “I mean on the Sr1 who would have though you would have let him teach you how to handle you biotics better or that now Kaidan would be a _teacher_?”

Reese glared even though she knew the smarts ass pilot had a point. Kaidan chimed in, “You know he’s right.”

“That doesn’t mean you have to be on his side,” Reese muttered folding her arms. Of course Kaidan was just stating the truth. He wasn’t trying to be an ass about it, and he was just trying to keep her from doing anything hasty. He knew her too well and it was a party after all. One the Commander had let Joker put on for the crew to kick back and relax while they could. Being mad over something that clearly didn’t anger Kaidan wasn’t going to help with that.

“ _Fine_ ,” she finally said as Kaidan gave her a knowing grin and motioned for her to actually sit on the couch beside him instead of behind him.

As she silently complied, he threw an arm around her shoulder. Leaning over he murmured into her ear, “You like my biotics. And that’s what counts.”

She nodded as Joker said, “Since you two are nerds why don’t you educate the rest of us about biotics?”

“Wasn’t the floor show earlier on the balcony with Vega enough?” Alenko asked as he turned back to his friend.

“Ah, no. That was just James running his mouth,” he replied. “I mean sure you can throw things but your hair? You explained yours but why isn’t Reese’s hair—”

“I’m an L3, Joker,” Reese interrupted in annoyance leaning across Kaidan towards the pilot on the other end of the couch. “Remember? I got the better implant because of a staged eezo accident over my colony. My home was destroyed, and I ended up being a first gen second exposure biotic.”

“But you’re still first gen…”

“I was older when I got my implant…My biotics didn’t manifest until I was a teen…I—”

“ _Wait!_ You lucked out with being a second exposure, ending up with the better implant but you missed out on the throwing people and things around as a kid. How is that fair?” Joker said with disappointment in his voice.

Reese wanted to be angry but how could she be? When the pilot put it that way and she knew he was trying to make up for the initial comment that had upset her. She made a face but allowed a grin to appear. She leaned back against Kaidan’s shoulder. “Fine, Joker. I get it. But you’re still an ass.”

“Yet I’m not the one who can sling my enemies around…”

“Biotics aren’t all they appear to be, Joker. You know the L2s have a slew of problems. L3s are an improvement but there are always…problems…” Reese explained as she felt Kaidan gently squeeze her shoulders. “I…because of how I was exposed the second time, it did more than give me biotics. It messed up my metabolism. I have to take metabolic stabilizers every day. I have an increased caloric intake, even for a biotics, and I metabolize things so quickly I can’t truly get drunk.”

“Wait! You’re complaining about not being able to get a hangover?”

“Well, yeah. I never got to have that experience. It’s all been vicariously experienced…Kaidan has been kind enough to help with that…”

“I am not drunk.”

“Not yet.”

“So does he glow when he’s drunk?”

“Yep.”

_“Kori!”_

“You see when a human is exposed to eezo they develop the ability to manipulate mass effect fields using dozens of element zero nodules within their nervous system that react to electric stimuli from the brain. Biotic Amps allow biotics to synchronize the nodules so they can form fields larger and strong enough for practical use. Amplifiers can improve a specific discipline or talent. The implant is usually surgically installed during puberty or later if you’re a second exposure like me,” Reese explained knowing she was nerding out and didn’t care.

“Kori, you don’t have to—”

“Hey, knowing the science behind biotics is something everyone should know. It might help facilitate a better understanding between those with the abilities and those without them,” the Lt. Commander said. “Anyway, certain movements become associated with certain biotics abilities. The firing of neurons associated with those motions help control a person’s abilities. But flaring isn’t necessarily linked to that. So to answer your question…Yes. Kaidan does flare or glow as you put it. Usually when he gets happy or really excited.”

“Excited? About what?”

“Kori!”

“About things they don’t teach you about in biotics training.”

“Reese!”

“In the bedroom.”

“Kora!”

“And you discovered all this for the sake of science?” Joker asked with a broad grin as Kaidan slumped against the couch, red as an N7 stripe.

“Yep,” Reese replied with a shit-eating grin. “I learned a lot from Kaidan’s training in the SR1. Of course not everybody was privy to that kind of private tutoring.”

“You can stop anytime now, Kori.”

“That’s not what you say when we’re alone…”

“Somebody please tell me I’m drunk.”

“Not drunk enough, Alenko,” joker noted.

Kaidan groaned as Reese ran her fingers through his hair. In his ear, she murmured, “I love you.”

“I know,” he said softly as he gave her a small grin. Science only offered so many answers and understanding it could only get a person so far. But the biotic that sat beside her, grinning like a school boy at her completed the equation her life had become. If science and nerdiness did not offer her answer, Kaidan’s smile always would.


	3. Cooperation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lt. Reese nodded but said nothing as she focused on the briefing again. She saw him sit down across from her out of the corner of her eye.  
> Westmore leaned forward, dropping his voice to a whisper. “Look, Reese, I know this is important to you. I wasn’t on the SR1, but I know someone who was. I want to make a difference too. I believe Shepard was right. I believe Anderson, Hackett, and you are right. I’ve seen the crazy shit you’ve done. I want to be apart of that…if you’ll let me.”

_(Set after the original Normandy was destroyed)_

**_Monday, January 12, 2184 Alliance Headquarters, Seattle-Vancouver Megaplex, Earth_ **

****

Newly promoted to full LT. Kora Reese sat in an alcove at Alliance HQ away from everyone else. She’d been sent a request from Anderson to work with the Quarians on a joint project called Pandora. A classified assignment with a familiar face. Well, a familiar face behind a helmet’s visor. She looked at the brief Hackett had given her and wondered how the two admirals had gotten this little project past the Alliance higher ups.

Of course it _was_ Hackett and Anderson. Those two could hide just about anything in plan sight and convince those involved it was something completely different. Both legends in their own right, Reese had been tapped to continue quietly investigating the threat the Geth may pose in the future. That was not the secret this brief contained though. Instead this new project sought to look into anything that might resemble Sovereign. In other words the admirals still believed the reapers were a threat.

The destruction of the SR1 and Shepard’s death had only reinforced their believe that the commander had been right the whole time and Shepard had been targeted because of that. Now only the surviving members of the Normandy knew the truth, but the Alliance had seen them separated, placed far from one another in order to keep things under wraps. The Alliance would only acknowledge the Geth as a threat and that Sovereign had been a unique ship commanded by Saren.

Sighting the desire to avoid a public panic, the Alliance said they needed more evidence before they could go public with such information. Reese, never one to sit ideally by when she knew she were right, had gone to Anderson and Hackett asking for any assignment that could help prove Shepard right. Anderson had already anticipated her request and Hackett gave her the assignment with one caveat: she would have a handler to keep her out of trouble.

A _handler_. Of all the things she had never thought to have. Michael Westmore was the one. He was an L2 biotic, an N7, a SpecOps member, and a smooth talker. He was a good soldier, confident and able. He was also mouthy and not afraid to say what was on his mind. And now she was stuck with him. They had been on 4 missions together and a “date.”

It wasn’t a date per say by normal standards. It had been coffee from the mess and conversation consisting of trading barbs as he tried to convince her he wasn’t that bad and she would get used to him. The thing was she _had_ gotten used to him and he _wasn’t_ that bad. Now with this new assignment, there was only two people she could think of that she worked that well with.

The first was who knew where after he left her behind on Earth. Kaidan had disappeared after the SR1 had been destroyed, saying it was for the best and that he was no good to her as he was. Maybe that had been true be he still could have let her have a say.

The second was a surprise. The name Michael Westmore had meant nothing to her 4 months ago. Now it stared back at her as she glanced at the file. He was to be her partner in her new assignment. He was to serve as her protector as she did her research, be the one to say if something was too dangerous, the one who took a bullet for her if it came to that. He wasn’t there to tell her how to do her job. He was there to make sure the job got done but not at the expense of her life. In layman’s terms, he was there to keep her from doing something impulsively stupid.

She knew from the SR1 and from her friendship with Kaidan Alenko that accepting help was not a bad thing. It wasn’t a sign of weakness or a character flaw. It was a sign of someone willing to admit they didn’t know everything and could ask for help. Chasing down leads of Reapers was as good a reason as any to need help. And Michael Westmore seemed more than willing to work with her despite her obvious temper and impulsive nature.

Cooperation with a person she still getting to know on a mission she deemed important was worth any annoyance she might have in the future. She glanced up as a familiar red-headed marine saunter over towards her. He gave her that know-it-all grin of his as he came to stand in front of her.

“I hear you’ve been given a special assignment and the higher-ups have decided to have me tag along for the ride,” he said.

Reese made a face and then bit back her retort. “To be honest, I was thinking that I might _actually_ need you and that I should just swallow my pride and ask you to come along.”

“Wait! I’m sorry, Lt. Did I hear you right? You’ve decided you _need_ me to watch your back?”

“Yes, but you don’t have to be so smug about it,” she complained fiddling with pas the report that as on.

He cocked an eyebrow and regarded her thoughtfully. “You’re being serious.”

She nodded but said nothing as she focused on the briefing again. She saw him sit down across from her out of the corner of her eye. Westmore leaned forward, dropping his voice to a whisper. “Look, Reese, I know this is important to you. I wasn’t on the SR1, but I know someone who was. I want to make a difference too. I believe Shepard was right. I believe Anderson, Hackett, and you are right. I’ve seen the crazy shit you’ve done. I want to be apart of that…if you’ll let me.”

She lifted her head up to look him dead in the eye. “I _need_ you to be there…I don’t have anyone else that—”

She cut herself off. The guy was good and sincere but she wasn’t ready to share that part of herself yet. The part that Kaidan had left raw. A fresh wound still not healed. “Look, you’ve proven you’re the right guy for the job and I can trust you to watch my back. _That_ is what I need.”

“Fair enough,” he said leaning back in the chair. “I suppose I’ll just have to prove that I’m good enough to be friends with too.”

“Friends?”

“Yeah, friends. Don’t tell me you’re not familiar with the concept.”

“Oh no. I am. I’m just really hard to get along with.”

“Well, like I told you the first time we met. I like a challenge. And who knows, maybe I’m a challenge too.”

Reese rolled her eyes. Cooperation with Westmore was going to be a challenge alright. But something about the way he carried himself, the fact he wasn’t running from something that was obviously going to be hard. The fact he wasn’t running from _her_ meant something.

“Alright, Westmore. Challenge accepted. We learn to cooperate if it kills us.”

“Good. Except for the _kills us_ part.”

She laughed. Maybe working with him wouldn’t be so bad after all. It would definitely take her mind off another L2 and might even result it something good. At least a small bit of what Kaidan had taught her would help her find her way again. The rest would be up to her.


	4. War

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Be safe,” Kori whispered as he let go of her. 
> 
> As Kaidan walked towards the lockers he made a promise to himself. Anytime he walked away from her from now on, he would always come back to her. He would never leave her alone again not if he had anything to say about. The Reapers and their war be damned.

(This takes place during chapter 11 of Messages)  
  


**_Friday, September 22, 2186 CE, Sol System en route to Mars_ **

Kaidan Alenko had taken command of the Normandy until Shepard and Anderson arrived. He had assumed the admiral would have.. That hadn’t happened. The original N7 had reinstated Shepard and given command of the SR2 back to the officer he had once mentored. Now as they sped away from Earth, the L2 was left to wonder what now?

The Alliance had not even been prepared for a reaper invasion. Even with all the work Hackett and Anderson had put forth under the radar. The reapers had taken Earth from them without much of a fight. Either way they were at war. A war he knew they weren’t prepared for. One he wasn’t sure they could win. How could they when the enemy was so advanced and used your own people against you?

He fiddled with the weapons he had procured from the armory as he glanced at a trunk near his workbench. His SpecOps armor was contained within it. Kori had insisted he stow it aboard that very morning for just in case. Even with their time apart, he knew better than to discount her hunches. This was one time he was sure she wished she hadn’t been right.

With war spreading to the other species soon, he wasn’t sure what their plan could be. No one species was strong enough to conquer the reapers. It would take a collaborated effort between all of them. And the odds of that occurring naturally were slim. They would have to be convinced and that was where Shepard came in. It had been one of the last orders Anderson had given him. If anyone could carry that order out, it was John Shepard. But it was still a tall order to ask for.

With everything else going on he hadn’t heard anything from Kori. He knew she should have been on the Normandy but he didn’t know for sure. He’d assumed command automatically, too busy to let his concern and fear for her safety be at the forefront of his mind. She had training, she was resourceful, and loved to improvise. She would be okay. She had to be.

Kaidan took a breath as he thought of his mother and father. He knew he had been forced to leave them behind. His dad was a dedicated officer. Retired or not Gavin Alenko would make sure they were safe. His mom, Kaitlyn, wasn’t helpless either. They would be okay. They had to be…

They were at war now. Anything could happen, especially with an enemy like the reapers. But he had to have faith. He had to be strong. He had to believe…

Suddenly their was a chime and the elevator doors of the cargo bay opened to reveal Lt. Commander Kora Reese. Kaidan’s breath caught in his throat. She was okay. She was fine. She had made it off the planet and had been aboard the Normandy the whole flight from Earth.

Kaidan closed his eyes and took a shaky breath. One less thing to worry about or so the logical side of him said. The side that remembered he had woken up just that morning with her in his arms wasn’t so convinced. So many things were still unknown and so many things could still go wrong. He opened his eyes as the smile she’d given him that morning as they laid together before readying for the day flashed through his mind. He would fight to see that smile every day. He would fight a damned war for her, to keep her safe.

He watched as Reese exited the elevator and walked up to Shepard. The Lt. Commander saluted. “Lt. Commander Reese reporting, sir.”

Shepard turned around as he furrowed his brow. “Lt. _Commander_ Reese?”

“Ummm, yes, sir. I’ve been promoted a couple times since we met last, sir,” Kori explained as Kaidan kept his eyes on her. He knew she was aware of his presence and his gaze on her, but duty came first.

“I see. We’re heading to Mars to—"

“Meet up with Dr. T’soni, sir. I know. I kept a comm open thanks to EDI.”

“EDI? You _know_?”

Kaidan attempted to focus on his weapons as the _Normandy’s_ AI spoke up. He wasn’t truly successful as he continued to listen. “Jeff vouched for her. And as the ranking officer in charge of the retrofit, it was only logical for her to be aware.”

“I see,” Shepard replied, amusement in his voice.

“Shepard, you should also be aware that Lt. Commander Reese is the ranking officer aboard after yourself and Major Alenko.”

“EDI,” Reese snapped. Kaidan recognizing that tone. She didn’t want to be in command. “Joker can—"

“No, Joker can fly the ship, but I want _you_ in charge while I’m gone,” Shepard said firmly.

She frowned but offered no further protest. “Aye, sir.”

“I want a full report on everything when we get back and I mean _everything_ you can get your hands on,” the Commander ordered as he went back to his gear.

“ETA 10 minutes,” Joker called over the comm.

“Got it, Joker,” the Specter said as he walked over to Vega and the larger guns. He threw over his shoulder. “We launch in less than 10, Major. Make it count.”

“Yes, sir,” Kaidan replied as he glanced at Reese again. Shepard knew, even with just a couple of minutes of seeing Reese again, the Commander knew they were together.

Kori met his eyes, her lips quivering. She was trying to hold herself together. Had she been as scared for him as he had been for her? Had she been too caught up with getting the Normandy in the air to let him know she was aboard?

As calmly as he could the Major motioned for her to follow him over behind some crates in the corner. As soon as they were out of sight of the others, Kaidan took her in her arms, lifting her off the deck plates. He buried his head in her shoulder and whispered, “I thought I’d lost you.”

“I’m here…things were so hectic I didn’t have time to message you…I’m sorry,” she whispered back, wrapping her arms around his neck tightly. He felt her trembling against him as he tried to be strong for both of them.

“It’s okay. We’re okay,” he said pulling back enough to look into her grey eyes. She nodded as he saw unshed tears in her eyes. She was trying to just strong for him too. “We’ll beat those bastards and take back Earth. You have to believe that.”

“I do,” she replied, nodding with a weak smile.

He frowned, knowing the smile wasn’t genuine. It was to keep him from worrying about her. “Then why are you crying?”

“We just started working things out…We started talking about moving in with each other…It’s selfish…”

It was selfish but she had just voiced exactly what he had been feeling. Without seeking permission, he kissed her, putting everything he felt into it. He knew it was hard and demanding, more so that was normal for him. Memories of their night together before Ilos flashed through his mind. The desperation of that night, the danger of the pending mission, the need to know the other was still there. That they were alive. Just as they needed that now.

Kaidan felt her grab his shirt. Her arms still tightly wound around him. She was restraining herself as much as she could. He knew that but like her, he wanted so much more.

Reluctantly he pulled away, his eyes never leaving hers. “I need to suit up.”

“I know. Just—“

“I’ll come back to you. I will. I promise I would already, remember?”

“Kaidan…”

“I will, Kori. Believe that.”

“You’d better, Alenko. Or I’m gonna be pissed,” Kori said as she ran a hand through his hair.

“Understood, Lt. Commander,” he said with half a grin as he cupped her cheek. He would do it for her. He had to.

“Be safe,” Kori whispered as he let go of her. As he walked towards the lockers he made a promise to himself. Anytime he walked away from her from now on, he would always come back to her. He would never leave her alone again not if he had anything to say about. The Reapers and their war be damned.


	5. Cruelty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Humans unfortunately are cruel by nature in regard to things they don’t understand. When things scare them. And biotics fall under that category. But I also know that humans have a remarkable capacity for understanding, for compassion, and for adapting if they are given a reason to believe…I made a promise to myself a long time ago to give them that reason. To show them that they have no reason to fear biotics.”  
> ~~Kaidan Alenko

**_Monday, April 7, 2183_ **

Lt. Reese once again sat across from Lt. Alenko in the mess in the middle of the night eating ice cream. The deck seemed completed deserted except for the two Lt.’s. No one else was having a hard time sleeping due to the day’s mission. The Normandy had been dispatched to deal with an explosive situation on the MSV Ontario. Hackett had ordered them to incept and rescue the Chairman of the Parliamentary Subcommittee for Transhuman Studies.

In layman’s terms, Chairman Burns had been kidnapped by L2’s who were angered by his refusal to acknowledge their suffering. They were right to be angry. Burns was wrong to dismiss their claims over the problems the L2 implants caused. The way it had all gone down was a hot mess and an example of why Reese hated politics.

The two biotics sat in silence as the picked at the ice cream unlike the previous time they had engaged in such nocturnal activities. That time had involved Shepard giving her the choice to live up to the potential Anderson and Alenko thought she had or to leave the Normandy. She had chosen to stay after Alenko pointed out she was selling herself short and not everything had to be governed by biotics.

Now the actions of a man who was supposed to represent the needs of biotics, especially L2’s, and that same group of L2’s made her truly wonder if biotics would ever be accepted by humanity at large. She hadn’t been a biotic as a kid, being a second exposure. Her abilities manifested during her teenage years unlike Alenko. His abilities had surfaced during childhood. Either way, both were considered first generation biotics and faced the stigma of such a label.

“This isn’t helping is it?” the Canadian Marine asked from across the table, interrupting her thoughts.

Grey eyes glanced up from her barely touched ice cream. She shook her head. “Not this time.”

Kaidan set his spoon down as he pursed his lips. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Reese arched an eyebrow. Talking about her biotics had never been a thing for her before. She had never shared anything about it with anyone other than her grandmother. Talking to another biotic about it was just as foreign. “I…I don’t know…”

He snorted. “You can talk my ear off about tech all day long, but you can’t tell me what’s really bothering you.”

“No.” Her answer was simple not meant to be smart or defensive. She shrugged. “I just don’t know how to talk about it…I don’t understand it.”

“Understand _what_?” Kaidan asked as he shifted in his seat, the bowl of ice cream forgotten.

Reese took a breath. “What just happened on the Ontario. A guy who is supposed to represent those who are suffering or have suffered because of an unperfected device that was supposed to help make their quality of life better. The L2 implant for all its faults was supposed to help biotics. And it does but not…not to its fullest potential. You know that. L2’s suffer one way or another. Those who did everything but make it a law that you had to be implanted should take responsibility. L2s, _biotics_. We are still human. Yet until that jackass Burns was held at gun point by those he was supposed to represent, he didn’t give two shits. It was like biotics, especially L2s, are not human or something. It’s cruel.”

“Reese, you’re an L3. You don’t have the same prejudice as L2s,” Kaidan said slowly.

She felt her temper flare as she stood up suddenly. “I’m a L3 with a fucked-up metabolism that can’t live without taking medicine and stabilizers to counteract that. Don’t you tell me I don’t know anything about the prejudices biotics face. Just because you’re a L2 doesn’t give you the monopoly on feeling like a freak! You know how cruel people can be—”

“Reese, that’s not how I meant it,” Kaidan said as he watched her begin to walk away.

The tech stopped at the steps to the sleeper pods but said nothing. In stead she clenched her jaw, focusing on the floor grating. Her arms came up as if to hug herself as Kaidan made his way slowly towards her. Thankfully, no one had heard her outburst and they were still alone.

He stood behind her by several inches thinking of what he could say. She was right. L2 or not, all biotics faced discrimination and prejudice. In some cases they were treated as second class citizens if they were even acknowledged to be human at all. He had experienced it all since childhood and had parents who had been prepared and supportive of him through all his struggles. She hadn’t had that. He often forgot that.

Kaidan took a breath. They had been chosen by Shepard to join the team that boarded the Ontario because they were biotics themselves. Granted in the end, it had helped gain the group’s trust and Burns had promised to reopen the reparations request. The plight of biotics was front page news again but so was the fact a bunch of L2s had taken a government official hostage. Nothing was ever simple…

“Reese, I…I know that you have had a rough time with your biotics in ways I probably won’t ever truly understand. I at least knew about them from the time I was a kid. I know that I might get them, and I had parents who helped with that,” Kaidan began slowly, wondering if his words were going to make things better or worse. He’d take the chance regardless. “I know that you didn’t have that luxury and your abilities manifested with tragedy attached. Your experience is uniquely yours. I can’t know everything you’ve been through, but I can tell you that I know what it’s like to be treated differently.”

He watched as she shifted in front of him but still didn’t look at him. He went on. “Humans unfortunately are cruel by nature in regard to things they don’t understand. When things scare them. And biotics fall under that category. But I also know that humans have a remarkable capacity for understanding, for compassion, and for adapting if they are given a reason to believe…I made a promise to myself a long time ago to give them that reason. To show them that they have no reason to fear biotics.”

“But what if _I’m_ afraid of them? What if I’m afraid because of those extremists, we’ll all be labeled that now?” she asked softly, slowly turning to look at him.

“Reese, you—we can show them that resorting to extreme action isn’t the way…You and I didn’t get to were we are engaging in actions like that,” he said. A grin spread across his face. “Well, only one of us has a history of insubordination and it isn’t me.”

She made face. “I didn’t take a government official hostage and I’d take a reduction in rank again if it resulted in the getting the job done and saving lives.”

Kaidan chuckled as her expression turned serious. “What?”

“I was just wondering who the bad guy was on that last mission…It wasn’t clear cut…”

“No. It wasn’t. Both parties had their reasons and acted out without really thinking it through…It’s complicated. I’ll admit that,” Kaidan replied as he sighed. “I know that I’m glad Shepard was there. Someone else might now have handled it as well…I just wonder if I weren’t as lucky as I am if I…”

“Don’t do that. I have played the ‘what if’ game too many times. It never ends well,” Reese cautioned as she glanced at the mess hall table. Their bowls still there, their ice cream melting. “Just because others are cruel doesn’t mean we have to be.”

He glanced at her. “Reese, about earlier…I didn’t mean to sound like I don’t appreciate what it is to be an L3…”

“I know. I just—I haven’t ever really talked about my biotics with anyone before,” she said as she motioned back to the table. “But talking with you…about anything just seems…easy.”

Kaidan felt himself grin as he watched her pull her bowl of ice cream to the side of the table he had been sitting on. She sat down next to his bowl, beginning to eat the now soupy ice cream. He joined her as he realized he felt the same way. No matter what cruelty the galaxy threw at them because of their biotics, having another to talk to made things easier. Talking to _her_ made things easier.

“Maybe we should sneak out for ice cream more often,” he suggested half-jokingly, half serious.

“Maybe we should,” she replied meeting his gaze with a grin.

Yes, Kaidan thought. Talking to Reese would always make things easier.


	6. Indoctrination

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I know you are trying to rationalize everything that has happened, and indoctrination might explain it all away,” Reese said gently. “But you know as well as I do that it takes a strong will to be able to withstand contact with a Prothean Beacon. It takes someone with steel grit to go through what he has and not come out a mess. He is missing two years of his life. He woke up thinking that the Alliance wasn’t doing enough. The Alliance wouldn’t even acknowledge him or give him the support to fight the Collectors. Cerberus did. The whole thing was opportunistic and engineered but Shepard knew that. He is trying to fight against impossible odds when the galaxy told him to fuck off after Saren and Sovereign. I think you should give him the benefit of the doubt and trust him. I do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***Set during Chapter 3 of Broken Road***

_**Wednesday Oct. 25, 2186, Huerta Memorial Hospital, Citadel** _

“Do you think it’s possible that Shepard could be indoctrinated?”

The question caught Reese off guard as she prepped the next vid for them to watch. They had talked about many things during her visit to his hospital room but _that_ was not one of them. She snorted and ignored it as she selected _Star Wars Episode 5: The Empire Strikes Back_ to watch.

Kaidan called out as he shifted on the hospital bed. “Hey, Kori! I’m serious. With everything that’s happened—”

She glared at him over her shoulder. “I’m going to pretend I _didn’t_ hear that.”

The Major held her gaze intently, clearly not wanting to back down or change the subject. “You have to admit it _is_ possible.”

Kori turned to him as she paused the movie’s opening crawl. “ _Why_? Because you still have issues trusting a guy who _died_ saving all our asses and then was brought back to do it all over again? _And_ he’s having to do it a third time because the galaxy can’t get their collective asses together to fight an enemy that is clearly stronger and more powerful then they are?”

“Cerberus brought him back,” Kaidan said flatly.

Reese let out a groan of frustration. He could be so judgmental and inflexible in his thought processes sometimes. “Kaid, he didn’t exactly have a choice in being brought back by them. Anyway, he ended the Collector threat and told Cerberus to shove it afterwards. He turned himself and the Normandy over to the Alliance. What more do you want?”

“He could have been tampered with when the Illusive Man brought him back…He’s got implants. What if that reaper tech Cerberus used on their own guys on Mars was prototyped with Shepard?”

“Kaidan, are you listening to what you are saying?” she asked in disbelief and frustration. “The man we served under, the man who Anderson trusted with the Normandy _twice_ , and the man I am currently first officer for…You think he’s been indoctrinated but you have no problem with me serving on the same ship as him. Does that make any sense?”

Kaidan grew silent as he turned his gaze to the view out the large window. He worked his jaw as she watched him ponder her words. She walked from the vid screen to his bedside. He remained quiet as she sat beside him.

“I know you are trying to rationalize everything that has happened, and indoctrination might explain it all away,” Reese said gently. “But you know as well as I do that it takes a strong will to be able to withstand contact with a Prothean Beacon. It takes someone with steel grit to go through what he has and not come out a mess. He is missing _two_ years of his life. He woke up thinking that the Alliance wasn’t doing enough. The Alliance wouldn’t even acknowledge him or give him the support to fight the Collectors. Cerberus did. The whole thing was opportunistic and engineered but Shepard knew that. He is trying to fight against impossible odds when the galaxy told him to fuck off after Saren and Sovereign. I think you should give him the benefit of the doubt and trust him. _I_ do.”

“You do?” he asked as he continued to look out the window. Maybe he remembered how difficult it was to gain her trust back on the SR1. Maybe that would point him in the right direction.

“Yeah,” she replied. “And Shepard thought you might trust him now too…”

“I want to,” Kaidan murmured as he dropped his head, reaching for her hand.

“Then what’s stopping you?” she asked, squeezing his hand.

“I—I don’t want to feel like I let myself or others down again.”

“Again?”

He glanced over at her. His expression haunted. “I followed his order. Get everyone else off the ship. I followed it, and he died. I let that guilt eat me up inside and I left you. I gave you the stupidest reason for it and I lost nearly two years with you. I let you down. I let Shepard’s memory down. How—”

“How can you try to throw the indoctrination idea out there to explain your insecurities then? That’s _not_ like you, Kaidan,” Reese noted as she turned to face him.

“I—I don’t know how to talk to him about it. It’s a stupid thought in the back of my mind that won’t leave me alone.”

“Then you need to talk to him about it, instead of running hypotheticals with me,” she suggested as she motioned toward the paused vid. “I’d rather watch _Star Wars_ with you for the 100th time anyway.”

“We haven’t watched it 100 times, and you only saw it for the first time a couple of months ago,” he said with a small grin.

“So what? You’re taking up time with us by worrying about something that could be solved by simply talking to Shepard,” Reese retorted as she reached for her omni-tool. “In fact, maybe I should call him up so you two can talk instead of watching movie with me.”

Kaidan caught her hand before she could activate it. “Ah, no. I think I’ll talk to him tomorrow when he drops by.”

“So what am I supposed to do?”

“Sit here and watch this movie with me as I admit you are right,” Kaidan answered reluctantly.

“I’m sorry. I don’t think I heard you correctly. What was that?” she asked with a grin.

“Oh, you heard me, Kori,” he said as he moved to unpause the movie. “You’re right. I am trying to rationalize something I’m worrying about without going straight to the source.”

She made a contented hum as she leaned against his shoulder, the _Star Wars_ theme playing as the opening crawl resumed. Kaidan moved to wrap an arm around her as the began watching the movie.

“So you know indoctrination might kind of be like the ability of a Force user to influence weak minded individuals…”

“Kaidan—”

“If you put it in terms like that and combine it with what you said earlier about Shepard being strong willed, then there is no way he could be indoctrinated.”

“You are using _Star Wars_ logic to talk some sense into yourself.”

“Possibly.”

“Ah. Glad the blow to your head didn’t mess with your nerdiness.”

“I thought you liked my nerdiness.”

“I do. But the real question is: by your logic, is Shepard Luke Skywalker?”

“Sure. And I’m Han Solo.”

“ _Wait_. The guy who can move things as if he has the Force wants to be the handsome smuggler pilot?”

“Well, yeah. Like you said I can do a lot of things with biotics…Being Han Solo is different.”

“Why? Because he’s a lady’s man?”

“Well, no. Not exactly. I already have my lady anyway.”

“Are you insinuating I’m Leia?”

“Maybe. Is that a bad thing?”

“No. Because she doesn’t give a shit about what people think and still gets things done. And she doesn’t have to rely on a guy…”

“Kori, I said I wouldn’t leave again.”

“Han left Leia.”

“I’m not Han.”

“Good. I like my techboy just the way he is.”


	7. Free Space (Kora Reese's Service Record Summary)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of background on Kori through her service record

**_DOB:_** June 15, 2054

 ** _Place of birth:_** Atropos, Moirae colony, Ananke System (only planet terra-formed using the Destiny Plan*)

 ** _Last known residence_ :** Georgia, North America, Earth

 ** _Parents:_** Connor and Rayne Reese (deceased—Official: terrorist agents organized a drivecore failure over the Moirae colony; Classified: agents associated with defuncted Conatix groups and Cerberus engineered a drive core failure over the colony resulting in abnormally high amounts of eezo in the atmosphere killing most of the colonists and resulting in several second exposure biotic teenagers with medical complications)

[*the Destiny Plan involved the use of highly specialized nanites to create a breathable atmosphere and was developed by Connor and Rayne Reese; element zero was required to be transported through the atmosphere with strict quarantine procedures to avoid complications; Cerberus plan resulted in supercharged nanites which killed many of the colonists excerpt for those teens who had experienced a first exposure in their youth]

 ** _Known living relatives:_** Lukus and Autumn Walker—maternal grandparents; raised after parents’ death

 ** _Enlisted:_** 2171, high aptitude scores, scouted for special ops training

 ** _Education_ :** 2171 entered Alliance Academy on four-year scholarship based on grades and early testing: Age 17

 ** _Biotic training:_** received basic Alliance training (refused more advanced training); 2183- received special training from Lt. K. Alenko on SR1

 ** _Technical training:_** Four-year technical training and xeno-tech special emphasis

 ** _Military Training:_** basic training; tech/science training; received initial Spec Ops training—included infiltration and sniping

 ** _Awards/commendations:_** sighted numerous times for original thinking and inventive problem solving; also received several commendations for combat within first 6 months;

Insubordination citations also given on multiple occasions by all CO’s; no awards given until service on SR1

**_Personality Profile:_ **

**_Flagged:_** Will go to great lengths to accomplish mission/assignment goals to the point of disobeying orders and taking extreme initiatives; believes authority figures should earn her respect and loyalty but once earned not easily broken

 ** _Medical conditions:_** hyper-active metabolism due to presence of over-exposed nanites on Destiny Plan colony after accident noted above; L3 implant stable but overtaxing of biotics will cause headache, nausea, vomiting—rare occurrence of migraines

 ** _Physical attributes:_** Hair- dark brown

Eyes: Grey

Height: 5’9”

Weight: 140 lbs

  
**_Special Training:_** Field Medic certified Class A

 ** _Security Clearance Level_** _:_ Blue Alpha N4

 ** _N school training:_** Completed level N5; pulled for special assignment per orders from Ad. David Anderson for project codename: Pandora

**_Special Notes:_ **

2154 born on destiny plan colony Moirae

2169 (age 15) eezo accident destroyed colony and killed most of colonists except for 5% all children who developed biotic potential (later discovered all had previous exposure during urtero)

2169-70 (age 15-16) resided with grandparents in Atlanta, GA; attended public school where continued to show aptitude for tech/science; persecuted for showing biotic untrained biotic potential

2071 (age 17) put in application for early admission to Alliance training school; accepted with full scholarship to study “tech”; also received training for biotics

**_Service Record:_ **

**_Passed Assignments_ **

2176 SSV Kokoda CO Cptn Charles Gibson assigned to ships SpecOps group as infiltrator/sniper; ended assignment when refused to fire on colony rioters during food shortage; disciplined for insubordination and led to investigation of Gibson (Cerberus ties, courtmartial prison); refused promotion; dropped SpecOps---- ** _:_** first special ops assignment; ordered to fire on civilian targets during food riot, refused to take the shot, sighted for insubordination but incident lead to uncovering Gibson’s ties to third party interests

2177-2178 R & D under Mjr James Lowery- reverse engineering tech recovered from Turians during first contact war; started dev of own omni-tool mods; some later basis for N specialization mods/tools

2178 SSV Shenyang - assignment forced back to active field service/ship duty ; unofficially pushed by Anderson; CO Cptn Rebecca Hawkins; tech specialist on board; ship assigned to interspecies missions; cited for creative problem resolution but written up for solving problems without permission

2180 SSV Asimov —Cptn Thomas Garrett; SpecOps squad assigned to ship; N7 on board—several other N’s; provided tech support for groups activities; tendency to assume her tech/possible intel was better than others (was usu. Right but didn’t go thru the proper channels to tell ground team); occasionally provided support on missions; not uncommon to be dressed down for behavior

2182 pulled for integrated Turian-Human Team working to complete the Normandy Project; previous experience with alien tech and species proved valuable; Anderson recommended she remain on for the shakedown cruise…possibly longer

2183 (age 29) assigned to SSV Normandy SR1—Lt. JG; after Eden Prime attack stayed on and assigned to backup tech/ops for Lt. K. Alenko

2183-85 various classified assignments under Ad. Anderson and started N training Operation Pandora

2183—promoted to full Lt. after the Battle of the Citadel

2185 (age 31) promoted to Lt. Cmdr. by Ad. Anderson for classified missions project Pandora

2186 (age 32) in charge of retrofit of SR2; Reaper War—reassigned to SR2 as 1st officer and Chief ops officer

2186 promoted to N7 (field promoted)


	8. Guns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kora Reese would not let anymore suffer or die if she could help it. If that meant using all possible resources at her disposal she would. She couldn’t lose anyone else. She could lose Kaidan. Not after all they had been through to be together again. And no matter how many times he or anyone else teased her out how many guns she carried, she would still carry them. It was her way of having a backup plan or in her case one of several back up plans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***Sometime during broken road***

Reese had heard the same question since boot camp. It had disappeared until her tenure on the SR1. Before that she had spent her time in R & D which provided little opportunity for using them. At that point in her life, there had been no reason for them. After nearly being thrown off the original Normandy by Shepard for not living up to her potential, she reconsidered her choices. Now the question came up again with every new assignment she took.

_Why do you carry so many guns?_

The question often arose from the fact that first and foremost she was a tech. Secondly because she was a biotic. No one expected her to have Special Ops training especially when they looked at her file before the Normandy. After that assignment though, people just wondered why a biotic would want to carry a full load out. Weren’t her biotics enough?

The short answer was no.

The long answer was that Kora Reese had always had a love-hate relationship with her biotics ever since they manifested in her teens. Mostly hated until Kaidan Alenko had taken the time to help her better understand her biotics and use them more efficiently. The end result was her finally accepting them as part of herself and understanding that they did not have to control her.

Beyond that, tech had always been an interest of hers thanks to her parents and learning how to adapt that to the battle field was an enjoyable challenge. It involved using her brain which she considered a deadlier weapon than her biotics or weapons ever could be. Therefore it was her first line of defense and offense and why many of the current mods to omnitools had been developed prior to and during the reaper war. Being prepared and thinking outside the box had kept her alive. And shooting Omni arrows was fun.

But why did she carry so many guns if she preferred tech? Because sometimes tech just didn’t cut it much to her dismay. And if her experience had taught her anything it was to expect the unexpected. Geth beyond the veil. Thorian creepers. Cloned krogan. Rachni. Those had been her first lessons on the SR1.

Collectors. Geth still running amuck after the defeat of Saren. Sightings of strange alien ships on the outskirts of known space. Cerberus activities. Even the resurrection of Shepard were reasons she had agreed to the N school at Anderson’s request.

Now fighting reapers, something that was supposed to be legend just gave her one more reason to carry everything. Of course they were all heavily modified to her specifications and with the occasional exception of Kaidan Alenko, no one touched her weapons.

An M-3 predator heavy pistol. A M-4 shuriken submachine gun. A M-90 Indra sniper rifle. A M-23 katana shotgun. A M-96 Mattock.

She had carried the submachine gun and pistol through her whole military career. Even the assault rifle she had always carried, switching them out form time to time. The shot gun had been added after her first run in with husks on the SR1. Biotics were good at close range but so was a trusty shotgun.

The snipe rifle was a completely different story. She had been a certified sniper straight out of boot camp. More than that she had been selected for special ops training. It had been fine. She even enjoyed the challenge until her CO ordered her to execute civilians to coverup his involvement in a Cerberus operation. After that she had left SpecOps and concentrated solely on R and D. Anderson had coerced her back into the field after helping to work in the Normandy and then having her remain aboard. Proving to Shepard she belonged on the Normandy, she took out her sniper rifle once again and defended her crew mates when needed. Garrus had even offered to help dust off her skills with friendly competition once he learned she was a good shot.

So why did a biotic tech-loving marine carry a full load out? In the end, it boiled down to the fact she wanted to be prepared for anything. She wanted to be able to protect those she cared about and those that needed protecting anyway she could. In her 30 years of life she had lost too many people to things she could not control. The reaper war was no exception with the loss of her grandmother and the rest of her family after the reapers had obliterated Atlanta because of the N school located there.

Kora Reese would not let anymore suffer or die if she could help it. If that meant using all possible resources at her disposal she would. She couldn’t lose anyone else. She could lose Kaidan. Not after all they had been through to be together again. And no matter how many times he or anyone else teased her out how many guns she carried, she would still carry them. It was her way of having a backup plan or in her case one of several back up plans.

She wouldn’t be caught off guard again. She couldn’t lose anymore. That wasn’t an option. Not anymore.


	9. Respite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reese glanced up to see the fabled Northern Lights. He had been checking the time for them. He had to have been. Something he had talked to her about while they served on the Normandy. Seeing as a kid the Northern Lights, and he was making a concentrated effort to share that with her now. That thought stuck with her. He wanted her to see more of him than what had been allowed in the SR1. This was one of the ways he was trying to do that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***after the flashback in Broken Road chapter 17***

He had said she was the only one he wanted there. The only one he had ever brought to the cabin just north of Vancouver. Those words had hit her like a ton of bricks. Kaidan Alenko wanted her and no one else. The poster boy for Alliance biotics and the model marine wanted her in his life. Their relationship from the Normandy wasn’t just a fling despite her fear it would end up that way. It was real.

Kora Reese stood out on the porch of the cabin Kaidan had built after Jump Zero but before he’d joined the Alliance. It helped to keep his hands busy, made him feel like he was accomplishing something, allowed him time to think over what he wanted to do. Those were all reasons he’d said he’d built the thing. It was also a reason he had never brought anyone to the cabin before. He didn’t think anyone would appreciate those reasons. Until her.

It was a bold step on the part of the L2. One that was not lost on her. One she appreciated more than she could convey to him. She hoped her actions might one day show that to him.

As she glanced out towards the clearing in front of the cabin, she saw Kaidan glancing at his omnitool yet again. He was waiting for something, but she wasn’t sure what. All she knew was that it was defiantly colder than the Appalachian mountains she was used to, having stolen his Alliance hoodie to wear.

Finally the Canadian marine turned back to her with a broad grin. “It’s just about time.”

Reese watched as he extended a hand towards her, beckoning her to walk over to him. She shook her head in amusement and did as requested. “This better be good, Alenko. It’s cold out here.”

“It’s worth it. I promise,” he replied as he wrapped his arms around her, her back to his chest. He murmured into her ear, “I can always warm you up later.”

“Kaidan—“

“You didn’t complain last night or right after we got here,” he short back, mischief in his tone.

“Damn, Alenko. If I didn’t know better, I’d think that was the _only_ reason you brought me here,” she teased.

“Not the only reason, but one of many,” he countered as he pointed up. “Another one is above you.”

Reese glanced up to see the fabled Northern Lights. He had been checking the time for them. He had to have been. Something he had talked to her about while they served on the Normandy. Seeing as a kid the Northern Lights, and he was making a concentrated effort to share that with her now. That thought stuck with her. He _wanted_ her to see more of him than what had been allowed in the SR1. This was one of the ways he was trying to do that.

As the green light shifted and shimmered above she leaned back against his chest. He responded by holding her closer. “I miss this when I’m off planet. It was something that was always there as a kid but always changing too…I guess I thought it was nice to know that something could always exist and still be amazing to look at, to see even though it was ever changing.”

“Are you talking about the northern lights or about you?”

“Maybe both. Maybe you too.”

“Me?”

“Yeah. You. You aren’t the exact same person you were 5, 10, 15 years ago. You aren’t even the same person you were during the Eden Prime mission.”

“I’ve changed?”

“You’ve _grown_. You don’t go through the crap we have and not grow…well some people who refuse to grow just become a shadow of what they could become… You’ve chosen not to do that and that says a lot about your character.”

“This isn’t exactly overly romantic, techboy.”

“I was—I just thought you should know that. I was lucky enough to have people who taught me that growing up. I know you have a good family but it never hurts to hear it again from someone who cares about you,” he mumbled.

Reese turned in his arms to look at him. “Kaidan, what is it?”

“With everything we’ve been through, we were lucky. We came out alive. We came out on the winning side. And we came out with each other,” he murmured as he cupped her cheek. “I just thought with this little respite we have maybe I should tell you that…That I’ve admired you since we first met.”

“Are you sure about that, Alenko?”

“Yes, ma’am. I am. You are…amazing. Annoying and scary sometimes but amazing,”he replied with a smirk.

“I suppose that is your attempt at being romantic,” she said as he leaned down to her level.

“I need practice. I know,” he admitted. “Will you give me the chance to practice?”

“I might be able to do that,” she murmured as he kissed her.

Things were definitely different than they had been just a few months ago. There was no mistaking that. But where they went from here in the solitude of kaidan’s cabin under the northern lights was anyone’s guess.


	10. Found

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The question Kaidan faced now gnawed at him. Was he brave enough to face Kori, admit the truth of his mistakes, and do whatever it took to see her smile again?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***This takes place during chapter one of Messages and shows Kaidan’s side of the chat conversation***

_**February 24, 2186 CE, Vancouver-Seattle megaplex, Earth** _

_I would like to talk to you when you are free. Just contact me at this username. Reese_

Those words blinked at him as he went over progress reports on his laptop for the students in his biotics company. He still couldn’t believe Anderson had agreed to a briefing in person on the program’s progress or that he had run into Reese. That wasn’t true. His whole reasoning for being on Earth was to run into her. He had used Anderson’s interest in a special ops biotic unit as an excuse to be on Earth at the same time Lt. Commander Kora Reese was.

It had been easy enough to engineer. Anderson had never really been too secretive about the fact he employed Reese in multiple operations below the radar. What did surprise the Major was the Admiral’s willingness to give up her current location and assignment so readily. Kaidan had suspected for years now that Anderson knew of their relationship from the SR1 and was secretly rooting for them to reconcile. Apparently, the former Normandy Captain had no problem aiding Kaidan in his attempt to at least see Reese again but he would never admit it.

Kaidan knew he had been waiting and hoping she would use his contact info. He had left that choice up to her. After the way he had walked away from her, he didn’t want to force her to do anything. Not that anyone could force Kora Reese to do anything she didn’t want to.

He closed out the progress reports and opened a chat box to reply, focusing solely on a response to her. He owed her no less.

The Major began typing.

.

_Techboy_sr1: I can talk now…kori13_

_Kori13: I thought you would be asleep_

_Techboy_sr1: no. couldn’t sleep. You?_

_Kori13: finishing paperwork_

_Techboy_sr1: really?_

_Kori13: yes…no…sort of_

_Techboy_sr1: thought so_

_Kori13: Couldn’t sleep…too much going on_

_Techboy_sr1: Anderson told you about Shepard_

_Kori13: Yes_

_Techboy_sr1: I had a meeting with him after you_

_Kori13: You have a special assignment too_

_Techboy_sr1: Have had one. Just moved earth side for awhile_

_Kori13: Same here with the retrofit and all_

Kaidan watched the cursor blink in front of him. He felt as if she had wanted to type more but wasn’t sure. Was she having second thoughts? The manner in which they had parted ways didn’t inspire him to hope she wanted to continue their conversation. He hadn’t contacted her at all in two years. Things he’d learned about her had been second hand until two months ago. A letter from a member of the SR2’s crew who had perished on the mission to stop the Collectors had reached him.

A letter from Michael Westmore. An L2 he had met prior to Jump Zero through a support group for kids with biotic abilities. They had gone through Brian Camp together and had become uneasy friends. They had served together a few times with Mike becoming aggravated that Kaidan passed him in rank even though he joined the Alliance after Mike. They had always had a friendly rivalry but that changed when Mike began dating Kori.

Kaidan knew it was his own fault. He had pushed Kori away after the SR1 went down, believing that he was the cause of Shepard’s death by obeying his last order. He convinced himself that he was no good to anyone and that he would hurt Kori. In the end, he _had_ hurt her but not in the way he believed. Mike was very clear in that point in his letter and despite chewing Kaidan out thoroughly, Westmore still believed that Kori and he loved one another. And in that case, he had sent the letter in the hopes that Kaidan would put aside whatever misgivings he had and seek her out. To take a chance on her again and keep her safe.

Mike had died protecting Joker during the Collector’s ambush of the Normandy, buying the pilot the time purge the ship and take back control of the Normandy. Guilt had plagued him for weeks until he realized what Mike was asking him to do. Despite all the falsehoods Kaidan had convinced himself of, Mike was right. Kori might still love him. He already knew he still loved her.

The question he faced now gnawed at him. Was he brave enough to face her, admit the truth of his mistakes, and do whatever it took to see her smile again?

_Techboy_sr1: Are you still there?_

_Kori13: Yeah just wondering what to say…_

_Techboy_sr1: You don’t have to say anything_

_Kori13: It’s been a long time…_

_Techboy_sr1: I know…it’s my fault_

_Kori13: Not everything is your fault_

_Techboy_sr1: This is_

_Kori13: Why?_

_Techboy_sr1: Because I walked away from the best thing that ever happened to me_

_Kori13: Alenko…_

_Techboy_sr1: You should get some sleep now. I’ve got your username now. I’ll contact you later. Goodnight Kori_

Kaidan closed out the chat box and shut the laptop. He stared off at the blank wall of his quarters in the barracks. What the hell was he thinking? Following the last request of a dead man who had more sense that he did when it came to an incredible woman? Was Mike right? Did he deserve a second chance with Kori?

It was then that he realized he had addressed her as the nickname he had given her on the SR1 and that her username was that now. The thought that she wasn’t over him either crossed his mind. Hell, he had changed his username from _techgeek_ to _techboy_ because of that. Even though he had been the one to walk away, he knew he could never truly let her go.

Through fate, the efforts of others, or pure dumb luck, he had found Kori again. He would be damned if he didn’t try to at least make up for what he had done. He wanted more than that. He wanted to have the future they had talked about before the SR1 was destroyed. He wanted her to smile because of some random thing he said. He wanted to be the one to give her strength again. He wanted to spend whatever time he could with her but only if she believed he was sincere. At the moment he just wanted the chance to make things right.

He wanted back what he had found over two years ago and foolishly let go of.. But would his efforts be enough?

Only time would tell.


	11. Allies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Of course, that’s all conjecture. But if it’s real, if it means anything to you at all, hold on to it. You never know when you’ll need that support. When you’ll need an ally that you can count on no matter what.”
> 
> “I—”
> 
> “Don’t throw it away just because you’re scared…I—I almost did that with Kahlee…I came to my senses thankfully,” Anderson admitted. “But I know I would have regretted letting her go. I don’t want that for you. You’ve lost a lot. There’s no reason to lose more by your own hand.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place during Kori’s time on the original Normandy during 2183

“Are you sure I can’t punch him in the face?”

“Yes.”

“What if I just break his nose a little?”

“ _Kora_ ,” Captain David Anderson scolded even though he made no attempt to hide the grin that played upon his lips.

Reese huffed as she watched the doors close behind Ambassador Undina. The Earth Representative had left his office after dressing down the Lt. for her near-miss on one of the Cerberus related missions the Normandy had undertaken. She had been shot in the leg while her barrier had been down. In truth she hadn’t even had it up while to hacked a door. The result was Shepard giving her a choice and one last chance to prove she deserved to stay on the Normandy. In that vein, she had agreed to be coached by Lt. Kaidan Alenko in her biotics and patience.

Even with those provisions, Udina believed she was a problem for the high-profile mission Shepard had been entrusted with and should be removed. Anderson had anticipated that and called the Lt. to a meeting, with the foreknowledge that the Alliance Brass agreed with his assessment of Reese as long as she continued to play well with others. Of course playing well with others took on a whole different meaning aboard the prototype warship.

Shepard had enlisted the help of a C-Sec officer, a Turian named Garrus Vakarian who didn’t necessarily agree with his employer’s rules and was an amazing sniper. A Krogan merc named Urdnot Wrex looking to gain revenge on Saren and keep reminding the galaxy the Krogan were more than a just a tool to be used. The Asari archeologist, Liara T’Soni was the daughter of Matriarch Benezia but seemed nothing like her mother being only a 106. A kid still according to Asari norms. Then there was the Quarian pilgrim, Tali’Zorah nar Rayya, who had the uncanny ability to tinker with anything and make it work with duct tape and spit. So to speak. Honestly, Reese had no problem making nice with any of the aliens currently aboard the Normandy. In fact she and Tali had become good friends, bonding over tech. And she had worked with Turians extensively during the development of the Normandy.

What really surprised her was the fact the humans on the ship seemed to accept her, even with her tendency to do things her own way. Even with her reputation and record known to a majority of the crew, they seemed willing to give her a chance. She knew Anderson would not have given them a pep talk about her but still he expected the best and got the best. And he still saw her as one of the best. Somehow…

“Are you there?” The Captain’s voice called her back to the present in Udina’s office.

She glanced at him and shrugged. “Physically, yes.”

“Mentally is debatable?” Anderson asked with a grin. “You never could keep your mind on one thing without thinking about the next. You always have to be prepared for the next eventuality. Been that way ever since I met you.”

“I have reasons…” she muttered looking away to the balcony overlooking the presidium. He knew all too well about her reasons. The biggest being the destruction of her colony by Cerberus eezo experiments and the death of her family.

“You know you aren’t alone. You don’t have to do things alone. You’ve never had to,” Anderson noted as he came to stand shoulder to shoulder with her. “You just insist on doing things the hard way.”

“If I do things alone, I don’t have to worry about people getting killed or leaving,” she insisted.

“That’s bull, Kora, and you know it. You’re afraid of feeling things for people and getting hurt. Being left alone again,” he accused as he glanced at her. “You don’t want to feel those emotions again. I get that. I really do. But are you really better off not feeling them at all?”

“I don’t like emotions, they’re so messy,” Reese stated flatly, still refusing to look in his direction.

The Captain snorted as he leaned against the railing of the balcony. “I think you’re mistaking feelings for paint.”

The Lt. rolled her eyes. He had called her to the meeting for more than just supporting her assignment to the Normandy against Udina it appeared. She turned to him opting to continue informally. “Okay, David, why _else_ am I here? I am playing nicely with others now. Shepard told me he’s told you as much.”

“Well, you’re not wrong. Shepard has an eye for talent and wants to keep you there. He needs allies he can count on for this mission,” Anderson explained. “You need allies too. People that can show you that working with a team is acceptable. The Normandy is the perfect place for that. You are thriving there. By all accounts, you might even get a promotion after this.”

“Yeah, still doesn’t cancel out my demotion.”

“Well, no. But remember that was bullshit any way you look at it,” he commented. “The only good things was that you took down another Cerberus op.”

“So? I play well with others. I gain allies. Then what?”

“Well, making friends doesn’t hurt either,” he suggested. “Apparently you’re friends with Tali’Zorah. That I saw coming. Someone who knows tech better than you…Of course you’d gravitate towards her. But then there’s Lt. Alenko…”

Reese did her best to keep her reaction under control. “He’s coaching me in my biotics—”

“Kora, I _know_.”

“Sir?”

“Don’t play dumb, Lt. The way he writes his reports about your progress. They are methodical, meticulous. The model report. But the fact he has stood up for you _twice_? And you haven’t fought him on anything?” Anderson eyed her closely. “I’ve known you long not to know something is going on.”

“David, I—”

“Of course, that’s all conjecture. But if it’s real, if it means anything to you at all, hold on to it. You never know when you’ll need that support. When you’ll need an ally that you can count on no matter what.”

“I—”

“Don’t throw it away just because you’re scared…I—I almost did that with Kahlee…I came to my senses thankfully,” Anderson admitted. “But I know I would have regretted letting her go. I don’t want that for you. You’ve lost a lot. There’s no reason to lose more by your own hand.”

She glanced at him. “I…I don’t want to lose him.”

“Then don’t,” he said. “But I really don’t know anything other than he’s an _ally_ you can count on. He has your back and you know that.”

She sighed. He was right of course. He always was. She wondered if Shepard felt that way too. Reese made a face. “I won’t let that be a regret. But I do regret you not letting me punch Udina.”

Anderson chuckled. “Don’t worry. I have a feeling someday soon, someone will show him a right hook. I just hope that person is me.”


	12. Green

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I’m going to tell you what I’ve always told you. Walk your own path. If you are refusing this promotion because you’re green and don’t want to piss of the wrong people and believe me there are those that are not happy with you because of how this went down, that’s the wrong reasons. If you’re refusing this promotion because it doesn’t sit right with you, if you’re gut is telling you that it is wrong, then you already know what it do. You always have. So do it. I’m proud of you either way."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place at the end of Kori’s first assignment during the Broken Road timeline around 2176

Her first assignment had been aboard the SSV Kokoda, serving with the ship’s marine detachment. She had two jobs: see to the team’s tech needs and serve as a sniper should the need arise. When not in missions her duties centered around ship operations. Both she was exceedingly good at. But that wasn’t Ensign Kora Reese’s current dilemma.

She glanced down at the message from Alliance Command. They wanted to promote her. Six months at her new assignment and they wanted to bump her up in rank. She was sure anyone else would have jumped at the opportunity for advancement. But in that moment she just couldn’t. Not after what had occurred less than two weeks before.

Reese glanced over at the long hard case in the opposite side of her small temporary quarters on Arcturus Station. The sniper rifle she had advanced training in, the one she had been so proud to receive. The one that she had been ordered to use on civilians on a remote colony. An order she had not followed; her refusal revealing her CO’s true motivations. Either way, his career was over and now she was up for promotion.

Reese had already shot a message to the one person she thought might understand her position. David Anderson. Granted he was busy. Granted he had his own ship to run. Granted she knew what he would say. It would be the same thing he always said. _Walk your own path._

If she did that she would be passing up a promotion. Was that how she should walk her own path?

The Ensign shut her eyes and thought back to the incident two weeks prior. The Kokoda had been rerouted to Angel One colony after there were reports of civil unrest. As it turned out, the colonists were rooting over the lack of food. Or more specifically the lack of food being passed out. Raids on supply routes by Batarian pirates had led to a food shortage and an outside group had taken control of the emergency supplies.

Her captain, Charles Gibson, had ordered a ground team to find the targets and take them out. What the team had not known was that their targets were actually the civil government officials who had stumbled across a Cerberus cell embedded within the colony. The food riot was simply a way to cover up the operation. Reese had been ordered to take out the officials and almost would have had she not had a secondary scanner running on her omnitool. As someone who had dealt with Cerberus before and with a personal vendetta against the group, she never left anything to chance. Her omnitool was modded beyond specs to look for anything Cerberus related or just out of the ordinary. As a result her tool had picked up scrambled comm traffic that once decoded, pointed to her captain being in league with the real targets.

Refusing her orders, Reese had instead tracked down and dealt with the Cerberus agents. None lived to make it to trial. Gibson had effectually had her team hunt her down and brig her back to the Kokoda’s brig. He threatened to throw the book at her but unfortunately for him she had already uploaded all the evidence she’d collected to Alliance command and the colony records. ANN was also graced with the evidence.

Within a day, another ship had arrived to take Gibson into custody once it was made clear that he had been attempting to cover Cerberus’ operations. Soon after it was discovered that he had extensive Cerberus ties and had been filtering information to them in exchange for favors. Either way, he was no longer a threat and neither was Cerberus on Angel one.

But she had disobeyed orders. She had been serving under an officer who worked for Cerberus. She hadn’t even an inkling that the man had been working with the people responsible for the destruction of her colony and the death of her family. The reason she had biotic abilities that not only frightened others but herself as well. She had never wanted any of that to happen. She had never asked to be able to throw someone across the room with her mind. She never asked to be different.

She opened her eyes as her omnitool beeped. It was a message. Anderson had actually replied. Maybe he had expected her to message him. He was good at that.

_I’m going to tell you what I’ve always told you. Walk your own path. If you are refusing this promotion because you’re green and don’t want to piss of the wrong people and believe me there are those that are not happy with you because of how this went down, that’s the wrong reasons. If you’re refusing this promotion because it doesn’t sit right with you, if you’re gut is telling you that it is wrong, then you already know what it do. You always have. So do it. I’m proud of you either way._

_Green_? She was definitely that. He first assignment and she gets her CO a court martial and a prison sentence. Who would want to work with her after that?

She glanced at the sniper rifle case one more time. She was good at it but that didn’t mean it was for her. Not after everything. _Tech_. She’d always been good with that just like her parents. She could live with that.

She’d walk her own path alright. Green or not, she’d stay an ensign for a little while longer. She’d make the next rank on her own terms whether she pissed people off or not. She’d saved those people on Angel One and she’d done it her way. If that wasn’t good enough, too damn bad.


	13. Armor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was like she wore an set of armor all the time, afraid someone would get too close. That someone would discover the real Kora Reese. Now as he watched her again take her armor off piece by piece he realized that he knew her better than most. How that had happened was anyone’s guess. But he likened it to how he realized he watched her every time they returned from a mission, making sure she were really okay both physically and mentally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This occurs on the SR1 during the Broken Road timeline

It seemed to have occurred gradually. Slow enough that he didn’t realize he was doing it. Often enough that someone else had. Of course that person had been Ash. She just seemed to notice things like that. She always said there was a reason scuttlebutt got started to begin with. Apparently staring however covertly at another marine while they took off and cleaned their armor was just such a reason.

Ashley had teased Kaidan privately about it but would never push. In the first few weeks Williams had become a trusted ally both in battle and navigating the Normandy’s social network. All she had said beside the teasing was that the object of his attention obviously had a hard time trusting people and he’d be an idiot to break that fragile trust she’d given him.

Kora Reese had been the one to capture his attention from the time he’d caught her making adjustments to the Normandy without permission, to the time she hadn’t had her barrier up and was shot, to the times Shepard looked as if he was torn between throwing her off the Normandy or giving her a medal for her quick thinking. Her tenacity, her stubbornness, her unwillingness to forget about anyone made him both admire and empathize with her.

In a way she reminded him of himself as a youth. Angry and untrusting of people after Jump Zero until he found a better way. It was no secret Anderson had requested her posting to the Normandy but what was not widely known was that she had always had an ally in the captain. He knew her potential and refused to accept anything less. And so she remained in the SR1 to prove to him that she was worthy of his support. Alenko had stepped up to offer his own support when he recognized what his former CO saw in her. It was Reese though that forgot sometimes what she was truly capable of.

It was like she wore an set of armor all the time, afraid someone would get too close. That someone would discover the real Kora Reese. Now as he watched her again take her armor off piece by piece he realized that he knew her better than most. How that had happened was anyone’s guess. But he likened it to how he realized he watched her every time they returned from a mission, making sure she were really okay both physically and mentally.

This last mission though…

The mission to rescue the chairman of trans human studies from a group of biotics extremists had taken a lot out of both of them. Shepard had settled it with the help of words from both Kaidan and Reese but it still stung. Their own people resorting to such extremes just to get reparations. The actions of neither side settled well with Kaidan and he had reason to think Reese agreed with him.

Lt. Kora Reese was far from being helpless. That was something she prided herself on but what she was reluctant to admit was that she needed a shoulder to lean in. In recent weeks, Kaidan had found himself being that shoulder to his great surprise. She had confessed small things to him, things that in the grand scheme of things probably didn’t matter but it mattered to him. He remembered her favorite ice cream, that she drank hot chocolate and preferred cappuccino to regular coffee, that she had binge watched a 21st show called _Mythbusters_ too much according to her grandmother. All things mentioned offhanded but he still remembered.

Finally done with his own armor he put it in the automatic cleaner as he walked back to her. She had been the last off the MSV Ontario and the last to begin changing out of their armor. She still hadn’t made much progress as she started blankly at her helmet’s visor. He took her gloves and put them in the cleaner as he asked, “Do you want to talk about anything?”

She shook her head as he gently pulled the helmet from her hands. “Do you need anything? Are you hurt?”

Reese shook her head again. “I just—I’m fine.”

Kaidan shook his head this time. “No you’re not. But you don’t have to talk to me if you don’t want to. I’ll listen if you need to later though.”

Grey eyes met his. Physically she was fine. But he could tell the mission had been emotionally taxing. She was still coming to gripes with her own biotics and for this to happen…it must make everything he’d been trying to get her to understand even harder to accept. Granted he wasn’t feeling too great about biotics right now either. But at that moment his concern was Reese and hoping that she wasn’t having second thoughts about the training her was giving her.

She began taking off the rest of her armor; Kaidan silently taking it to the cleaner piece by piece for her. She was thinking about how to respond to his offer. It would normally be one of two things: either telling him to mind his own business or just deny needing anyone to talk to. This time he wasn’t so sure.

When the last piece of armor had been put in the cleaner, Kaidan suggested gently, “Hitting the showers and checking in with Chakwas couldn’t hurt things. The Commander said we were off shift until tomorrow so you have some down time.”

When she didn’t respond he began walking away towards the door to the locker room. He wouldn’t push, not on something like this. That wasn’t how you got any where with Reese.

“Kaidan?” Her voice sounded small, hesitant. Anything but how she normally sounded.

He stopped at the door. “Yes?”

“If things aren’t…I mean if I…” she fumbled as if looking for the right worlds. “Is ice cream an option later?”

He smiled broadly as she caught up with him. “Yeah, Kori. I think that might be a good idea.”

Reese worn a small grin of her own as they walked out of the locker room. Maybe it would help. He remembered the first time they’d done it after Shepard had nearly thrown her off the Normandy for not doing her best. Anderson and Kaidan’s words had convinced the Commander to give her a second chance. It was during that midnight ice cream run that Kaidan had revealed how he thought she was letting her biotics control her because of her fear of them. It had been the first step towards them working together to change how she viewed biotics.

Now as they headed for the showers, Alenko realized that his original assessment had been correct. Reese did wear armor to keep others at bay, to keep anyone from caring about her and vice versa. If somehow, for some reason she was allowing him in, acrack had formed and he was starting to see more of the real Reese each day. Of course that only made him want to know her even better.

That also didn’t help with the emotions he felt when he thought of her. They were decidedly against regs but that didn’t make them go away. Regardless, he hoped to one day see her completely devoid of her metaphorical armor and just see Kori.

One day…


	14. Military

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But she had abandoned all that after her first assignment. Tricking herself into thinking that just using her skills for R & D and support roles was fine. The thing was, she was good on the front lines too, in the thick of things. And a part of her missed it. She could be doing more to honor the memory of those lost and those that supported her. She could be doing more for herself and use her military career to its fullest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> set during the flashback to 2183 in Chapter 19 Broken Road

Shepard had asked her why she was aboard the Normandy. Why she deserved to continue in that post. Why she had joined the Alliance to start with. He had contemplated removing her from his ship until Anderson and Alenko had spoken up on her behalf. It had surprised the hell out of her to be called out by Shepard but then supported by two other people. One she was only beginning to know well.

Either way Lt. Kora Reese had a choice: buck up and take on the responsibilities she had been hiding from for the pasts few years or get the hell off the Normandy. But could she do it?

 _You’re one of the best techs the Alliance has to offer, and you helped with the development of the Normandy’s systems but you’re_ not _a good soldier._

_I need you to be both. There’s no in-between on this ship._

Shepard’s words replayed over and over in her head as she attempted to sleep. He was asking her to take up what she had cast off years ago. She had SpecOps training, hand picked out of the Academy to receive more specialized training. She had become a sniper but her first assignment ended 6 months later with her CO court marshalled and a Cerberus operation exposed on a remote colony. The way it had gone down had left a sour taste in the young ensign’s mouth. One she had never recovered from. After that, she stuck with tech only.

_Anderson believes you are more of an asset than a hindrance. He seems to think for now your talent for understanding VI’s could prove useful against the Geth. But he had originally intended for you to undergo more combat training…then Eden Prime happened._

Her biggest supporter outside of her family had always been David Anderson. He had rescued her from her destroyed colony all those years ago and kept tabs on her. When he discovered she wanted to join the Alliance, he had given her a glowing recommendation which had landed her an early entrance into the Academy at age 17. Concentrating on the tech side of things, it had eventually led to her assignment with the team responsible for the development of the SR1. But clearly Anderson still believed she could and _should_ do more than research and development and tech support.

 _The second person, who suggested strongly…_ very _strongly, was Lt. Alenko. He believes you have ‘untapped potential’ to quote him. And of course he used logic to convince me to give you a chance to prove me wrong—_

Then there was Alenko. The man was a model soldier. A poster boy for biotics, specifically the L2s. And he wasn’t half bad to look at. But he was also _genuine_. He didn’t bullshit about things and for some odd reason he had decided to talk to her. Then he had decided to attempt to befriend her. Okay. He _had_ befriended her, much to her surprise.

He seemed like he was sincere in his desire to see her not get herself into trouble. Granted she usually did anyway but it seemed to happen a lot less when he was around. She suddenly wondered if he really was responsible for keeping her out of more trouble than she realized. He had never said anything except to jokingly say they should make up a chore list of things she could do without stirring up trouble. Would he do that? And why would he take up for her to Shepard? _That_ really confused her. No one did that after knowing her for only a matter of weeks. In fact she usually drove people away.

_Prove that you are supposed to be here, on this ship, on my team._

Shepard was giving her a chance to prove herself worthy of being on the Normandy despite his own reservations. He followed the recommendations of someone who had know her a decade and a half while the other had known her only a few weeks. They believed in her. That she could do more. Were they correct?

Reese turned to stare at the blank wall of her bunk. Could they be correct? Could she give up the misgivings of her past and move on? It was easier said than done. But if she wanted to remain on the Normandy, she _had_ to. And boy, did she want to remain on the SR1.

But Shepard’s original assessment that she had forgotten why she had joined the Alliance in the first place plagued her. She had joined because of her test scores and aptitude for tech. The Alliance was always advertised for people with those things. After graduating early from high school she applied to the Academy because they offered to provide a full ride. She had the option of serving a few years and then be discharged. She had chosen to stay and make a career of it instead.

But another more important reason had been a way for her to keep other colonies from suffering the same fate as hers. The Alliance protected. Anderson had been a part of that when he had responded to her colony and rescued her. He had served as a sort of mentor for her over the years, and she wanted to honor that. And in doing that, she could make a difference even with no family history of military service.

But she had abandoned all that after her first assignment. Tricking herself into thinking that just using her skills for R & D and support roles was fine. The thing was, she was good on the front lines too, in the thick of things. And a part of her _missed_ it. She could be doing more to honor the memory of those lost and those that supported her. She could be doing more for herself and use her military career to its fullest.

_The tech glanced over at a sleeping Alenko who was bunked across from her. He had his arm draped over his eyes as if he had a migraine again. How he functioned daily like he did, she wasn’t sure. She had her own issues…Reese sighed and looked up at the bottom of the top bunk. Then she growled and threw the pillow over her face._

_She was smart but apparently not_ that _smart. How had she lost sight of the goals and promises she had made in the academy?_

_Anyway tossing and turning would do no good in the long run. Remembering her promises and keeping them would…_


	15. Compassion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Doomed. That was the correct word. Doomed because she was rapidly finding fewer and fewer reasons to deny her growing attraction to the Lt. He was a great tech, a model marine, well-spoken, had a good sense of humor, was smart, kind, and compassionate. She knew she would have appreciated someone like to help with her biotics when they first manifested. Either way, she doubted giving into his puppy dog eyes would ever be on her regret list.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> During flashback scene in chapter 13 of broken road

After accidentally running into Lt. Alenko during shore leave while the Normandy was docked at the Citadel, Kora Reese had decided Alenko engineered the whole thing just to spend time with her. Well, it wasn’t like he had hid his motives as they avoided talking about the meeting Shepard was in with the Council and Ambassador Udina. In fact, they had gone to great lengths to avoid anything duty related. Talking instead about themselves, their pasts, their interests, their families. And Reese found that she rather liked that.

Or rather she liked talking to and being around the Lt. In fact, she loathed to admit it even to herself, but she enjoyed being the sole focus of his attention for the afternoon. Either way, Alenko showed no signed of running off to find something else to do.

After a rocky start to their impromptu shore leave outing, both admitting they were extremely bad at it, they found a place that served steak sandwiches and beer Alenko said was almost like home. Further conversation had led to them agreeing to call each other by their last names when off duty instead of by rank. As conversing with each other became easier, the pair wandered the wards aimlessly. Too engrossed in their conversation to care for the scenery.

It was when a pair of teenagers, probably twins 13 or 14 years of age began pointing at them that Reese stopped walking. They had wandered into one of the residential districts heavily populated by humans. The boy and girl were whispering excitedly and pointing. For the life of her, Reese could not figure out why they would be interested in two off-duty Alliance Officers.

“Reese, why’d you stop?” Kaidan asked confused as he looked at her.

She arched an eyebrow and motioned to the teens. “We have an audience.”

His whiskey colored eyes glanced to where she’d pointed as a holo advertisement for the Alliance Military cycled on at a nearby kiosk. More specifically it was pandering to biotics, alerting them to all the benefits of joining the Alliance because of their abilities. Flashing before her eyes was a picture of Lt. Kaidan Alenko at attention as the narrator carried on.

Reese grinned broadly. “Never mind. It’s _you_ who has an audience.”

Kaidan muttered under his breath. “I thought they had quit using that…I sent an email to the PR department about it… _Several_ actually.”

Reese glanced at him. He was turning red. He was embarrassed. Was it because of the idea that he was the poster boy for Alliance biotics or because she had seen it? Deciding to cut him some slack, she whispered, “We could hack the terminal. You know…Make it _not_ show a rather handsome picture of you posing for an Alliance PR campaign.”

“And get in trouble with C-Sec and Alliance Command? No thank you,” he declined with a sharp shake of his head.

“You’re only in trouble _if_ you get caught, Alenko,” she corrected as she noticed the teens hesitantly approaching them. “But forget about that, you have fans.”

He made a face at her and then put on his best Lt. façade as he turned to greet the kids. “Hello. Can we help you?”

“You’re _him_ , aren’t you?” the boy said as he motioned to the ad kiosk. “The one in the add.”

“Ummm…I—”

“Yes, he is,” Reese answered for him. “This is Lt. Kaidan Alenko.”

“See? I told you it was him,” the boy whispered to the girl. Turning back to the Lt.’s he added, “Steph didn’t believe me.”

Kaidan raised his eyebrows forgetting about his annoyance with Reese as the girl said softly, “I didn’t think they really let biotics serve. Some people say its just way to get rid of us.”

“ _Us_?” Alenko repeated, glancing quickly from the boy to the girl. He finally realized he was feeling more than just his and Reese’s biotics. “You are both biotics aren’t you?”

The girl nodded as the boy admitted quietly, “Yes. Our Dad is too, but he left…”

“He left because of work?” Kaidan asked, hoping it wasn’t for another reason. One he had seen far too often with parents who didn’t know how to cope with a biotic child. Even those who were biotic themselves had troubles. It didn’t make it right, but it happened regardless.

The girl shook her head. “He left when Sam first showed he had biotics…My biotics showed up after Dad left…”

Sam added, “That was 5 years ago. Mom hasn’t heard from him since. She tries but having both of us be biotics is… _hard_.”

Steph lowered her eyes. “We just…We see the ad all the time, and Mom says she’s not sure about it. She doesn’t want us to go off to war…”

Reese spoke up. “The Alliance isn’t just a military force. They are involved in R & D and joint civilian projects to help make colonizing easier and safer.”

“Who are _you_?” Sam asked rudely.

Reese bit back a smart remark as Kaidan waved her off. “This is Lt. Kora Reese. She’s assigned to the SSV Normandy with me. She’s assigned to ship operations but she’s _also_ a biotic. An L3. I’m an L2. Do you know what that means?”

“Yeah. It’s the kind of implant you have. Dad was an L2,” Sam replied proudly.

“Well, the implants they have now was better and safer than either of ours. When it comes time to get yours, you’ll have an advantage over us,” Alenko commented, trying to sound encouraging rather than angry that people had convinced the twins that biotics were a burden.

“What’s that?” Steph asked excitedly.

He grinned. “You’ll be able to have access to training and support that Reese and I didn’t. You’re second generation so there are more resources at your disposal,” Kaidan explained.

Sam shook his head. “Mom says getting an implant marks you and there’s no way to hide your biotics then.”

Reese watched as Kaidan bent down on one knee. “Do you hide your biotics _now_?”

The twins nodded. Kaidan made a sympathetic face. “I used to too. I was afraid people would think I was a monster or a freak. People even called me that. But my parents made sure I knew I wasn’t. I was just born with abilities others didn’t have. It’s like being good at sports or music or math. Not everyone is. Biotics just take a while to learn how to control. But you shouldn’t fear them.”

“But Mom doesn’t want us to be treated different…”

“And you shouldn’t be,” Kaidan stated firmly as he glanced up at Reese. “I’ve tried to use my service in the Alliance to help people see that biotics are nothing to be feared…Are you afraid of your biotics?”

“No. Not really,” Steph admitted.

“I like to be able to move stuff with my mind,” Sam said.

“Okay, that’s a good start,” Alenko replied as he stood up. “What if I could give you guys some people to contact? People that could help with any questions you have, maybe some training, and some education opportunities?”

“I don’t know… Mom doesn’t like random things we bring home about biotics. We’ve tried before,” Sam said dejectedly.

Kaidan grinned as a thought popped into his head. “What about bringing home two biotics instead? Two live people she can actually talk to.”

Steph smiled broadly. “Would you? Would you really?”

Kaidan shrugged as he turned to Reese. “I don’t know. What say you, Reese?”

His whiskey brown eyes begged her to go along with his plan. She could tell he really wanted to help the two young biotics. Something told her it was extremely personal for him and something akin to a promise he had made to himself. Maybe he had done just that. Promised to help other biotics after his own experiences made it clear more could have been done for the first generation.

_Compassion_. That was one word she instantly associated with what he was trying to do. Show a couple of random teens on the Citadel who were biotics compassion because everyone around them didn’t know how to cope with their abilities. He had dealt with them all his life. So the advertisement had been right; he was a poster boy but in the absolute best way possible.

_Please._

He mouthed the word to her continuing with puppy dog eyes. Reese sighed. She was doomed.

“Yes,” was all she got out before he had grabbed her by the hand and tugged her towards the excited twins. Following them in an unceremonious trot, she caught a quiet _thank you_ from the L2 as they made their way towards the twins’ residence.

_Doomed_. That was the correct word. Doomed because she was rapidly finding fewer and fewer reasons to deny her growing attraction to the Lt. He was a great tech, a model marine, well-spoken, had a good sense of humor, was smart, kind, and compassionate. She knew she would have appreciated someone like to help with her biotics when they first manifested. Either way, she doubted giving into his puppy dog eyes would ever be on her regret list.


	16. Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She found herself smiling as she shrugged. Maybe sharing a little bit of her past wouldn’t hurt. At least with Alenko that is. As she began telling him small things she realized how right her Gran had been. The Normandy really was the first place that had felt like home in an exceedingly long time and her friendship with Lt. Alenko played a large part in that. A part she was only starting to see and understand as she wondered where it would lead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this takes place on the SR1 during the Broken Road timeline in 2183

“So you have managed to remain aboard a ship for more than a few weeks,” an elderly feminine voice noted with a hint of amusement through the laptop’s speakers.

Lt. Kora Reese huffed as she sat cross legged of her bunk aboard the Normandy. The crew quarters was currently empty which provided her an opportunity to call home. Joker’s movie night was usually a big hit with everyone, herself included but this time she just didn’t want to go.

“Gran, I am perfectly capable of keeping a posting for more than a few weeks,” Reese protested indignantly. “My work with the development of the Normandy was nearly a year.”

“And _that_ , my impatient granddaughter, was not aboard a spacefaring vessel on a mission with the first human specter,” her grandmother noted with a grin.

“I can’t tell you what the mission is, Gran. You know that,” Reese said. “I am here because—"

“You _want_ to be,” she older woman said.

Reese shook her head. “Anderson talked me into staying…”

“As much as you look up to him, we both know even he cannot talk you into something you do not want to do,” she observed, the same shade of grey eyes meeting the Lt.‘s with a knowing gaze. “You are where you belong again, Kora.”

“You think I belong in space?”

“You have a wandering spirit, child. Just as you parents did. It was why they left Earth. Your mother was the first of our family to ever go into space,” her grandmother explained. “You want to explore, to discover, to challenge yourself. But most of all, you long for a place you feel at home. This ship, the Normandy, has become that for you.”

“Gran, I—"

“I have not heard you speak of your crew as much as you do now in an awfully long time. You _know_ them. And I dare say they have come to know you. You have shared with me their names and their likes and dislikes. You tell me of things you do with your crew during your free time,” she went on, pride in her voice. “You are opening up to these people like you haven’t done in a long time. I am so glad you have found a place where you feel you belong.”

Reese knew she had to be blushing as she muttered, “They still think I’m a pain in the ass.”

“As it should be,” her grandmother replied. “If you were not, I would think something were wrong…Now I seem to remember that a Lt. Alenko was his name? He has been especially friendly with you.”

“ _Gran_! Don’t get any ideas!” Reese protested a little too quickly as the door to the crew quarters opened up to reveal the man in question. She rolled her eyes as she added, “We are just friends.”

“I said nothing to imply that Lt. Alenko was anything other than that, Kora,” her grandmother said as Kaidan glanced over at her confused. “You are the one who thought otherwise.”

“Gran,” she said in a wary tone as she attempted to discreetly wave off Kaidan as the door shut behind him. “He is a _friend_. Don’t get ideas.”

Alenko arched an eyebrow as he mouthed, _talking to your grandma?_ Reese tried to make a face to keep him from approaching but her grandmother with her sixth sense knew something was up.

“Kora, is he there _now_?”

She groaned as she hissed, “Yessss.”

“May I speak to him, please?”

“ _Gran_!”

“Kora Dawn Reese! Quit being defensive. I am asking politely.”

“Yes, ma’am,” the Lt. murmured as if she had been scolded. She motioned to Alenko to come over beside her bed. He obliged, granted he looked as if he were a deer caught in the headlights doing it. “Gran, this is Lt. Kaidan Alenko, head of the Normandy’s marine detachment amongst other things. Lt., this is Autumn Walker, my maternal grandmother.”

“Ms. Walker,” he greeted politely with a nod of his head as he knelt down to the level of the computer.

Autumn Walker gave him a kind smile. “I won’t keep you long, Lt. I simply wished to thank you for being a good influence on my strong-willed granddaughter. She does not trust easily with good reason. For her to heed your words and call you a friend is no small thing. I pray you and your crew have a safe journey and maybe one day I will meet in person. Until then, I will bid you and Kora good bye. I believe I have embarrassed her enough for the time being.”

Kaidan stared at the screen in stunned silence as he nodded while Reese said, “Good bye, Gran. I’ll try to call again next week…”

She glanced at the silent Alenko and sighed. “Lt. Alenko says _bye_ too.”

Walker grinned as the screen went black. Reese shook her head. “Did my grandma break you or something?”

“What?” Alenko asked shaking his head as if to clear the fog.

“It’s not like you to not give a proper, polite goodbye,” she noted with a half grin.

“I—Well in my defense, I wasn’t expecting to talk to your grandmother when I decided to skip the movie,” Kaidan replied as he rose to his feet. “I thought I’d come and see what you were up to…”

“Well, you saw it,” she commented as she closed the laptop and placed it back in the bunk’s shelf.

“You skipped Joker’s movie to call your Gran in peace. I get that,” he said as he leaned against his own bunk across the aisle. “What I don’t get is why you got so weird when she implied we were friends.”

Reese glanced up at him not sure what to say. Instead Kaidan kicked the deck plate with his boot. “I thought we might actually _be_ friends and that wouldn’t be anything to be weird about.”

She glanced at her bed and then began slowly, “I’m not exactly…Well I don’t go out of my way to get along with people. You may have noticed that.

“I have,” Kaidan replied with a smirk as he crossed his arms.

She glanced up at him. She wanted him to understand. It was weird to her to want that. But her Gran was correct. The Normandy felt like home and Kaidan was a big part of that. “I don’t make friends easily. I don’t trust easily. But I do trust you.”

“You do?” The sentinel asked with no hint of sarcasm.

She nodded. “Yes.”

He smiled broadly as he asked, “So that means we’re friends, right?”

Wary of where he was going with his line of questioning, she simply replied, “Yes.”

He quickly sat down on the edge of his bed as he leaned towards her, “You don’t have to tell anybody that if you don’t want to.”

Reese met his steady gaze. The offer was genuine. His whiskey colored eyes didn’t hint at an ulterior motive, just simple honest Kaidan. She could keep it a secret, but he deserved more. He had put up with a lot from her yet he still came back for more punishment in her mind. Yeah. He deserved better.

Reese shook her head. “Nope. I don’t think I’ll do that. This is… _different_.”

“Different?”

“Yeah. It’s complicated like most of my crap is.”

“We’ve got time,” Kaidan noted as he mirrored her cross-legged position on his own bunk. “Jokers movie still has almost two hours.”

She found herself smiling as she shrugged. Maybe sharing a little bit of her past wouldn’t hurt. At least with Alenko that is. As she began telling him small things she realized how right her Gran had been. The Normandy really was the first place that had felt like home in an exceedingly long time and her friendship with Lt. Alenko played a large part in that. A part she was only starting to see and understand as she wondered where it would lead.

Maybe this time it could be different. Maybe this time home and friendship could be real.


	17. Happiness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaidan shook his head. Trying to figure out anything associated with Reese often resulted in a headache. He had enough of those with his implant. He didn’t need anymore because of a woman. But not just any woman. Reese was special and had been for quite awhile. He had only recently admitted that to himself after he began coaching her with her biotics. A working relationship had turned to friendship which had turned to flirting and possibly to something else. What that was he wasn’t quite sure but he knew he didn’t want it to stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before flashback in chapter 5 of Broken Road (with the mako)

It made no sense. She was impulsive. She was a smart ass. She bypassed the chain of command when she thought she was right. Which was quite often on both counts. She’d rather work alone than with a team. She was unapologetic about being forceful with her opinion. Everything that would normally drive him crazy. Everything that he would avoid.

But with her, he didn’t. Instead Kaidan Alenko was drawn to it, to _her_.

Lt. Kora Reese was a chaotic ball of energy that he didn’t necessarily want to tame so much as understand. Why did she insist on pushing most people away and doing things her way? Why did she not fear the consequences of her actions? Why had he been the one to get through the initial barriers she’d set up? Why had he tried?

Kaidan shook his head. Trying to figure out anything associated with Reese often resulted in a headache. He had enough of those with his implant. He didn’t need anymore because of a woman. But not just any woman. Reese was special and had been for quite awhile. He had only recently admitted that to himself after he began coaching her with her biotics. A working relationship had turned to friendship which had turned to flirting and possibly to something else. What that was he wasn’t quite sure but he knew he didn’t want it to stop.

“Are you okay there, Alenko?” The object of his thoughts called.

He glanced over at the panel that they had taken apart in one of the maintenance service crawled ways. Reese was laying on her back staring at him from where she had shimmied her way out. Her grey eyes looked at him with a cross between concern and amusement. Apparently she had said something to him and he’d missed it.

“Ah, yeah, Reese. Just thinking,” he admitted slowly. “What did you need?”

“I wanted your opinion on rerouting this. I know Shepard doesn’t like me changing things without approval,” she replied.

“What is it?”

“Just the air recycling system. It would make it more efficient,” she explained. “We ran simulations during development that suggested this configuration would work better but time didn’t allow for any tests. But the stress the Normandy has endured so far indicates it will work.”

“You’ve run sims?”

“Well, yeah. Tali helped too and seems to think it will work,” Reese noted with a little bit of trepidation.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“You don’t get nervous around me for nothing, Reese. So what is it?”

“I just really want your opinion that’s all.”

Kaidan knew he was looking at her like she had grown a second head. He couldn’t help it. She was asking for his unsolicited opinion on a project she clearly had done her homework on. She’d even gotten a second opinion already from their resident quatrain. Why did she need his? Maybe she didn’t. She’d said want not need.

She watched as she began to retreat back into the paneling, mumbling as she went, “Never mind. I’ll ask Shepard if it’s okay in the morning. It’s getting late—“

Before she could disappear fully he gently laid a hand on her knee. “Hey! Where are you going?”

“To put this panel back together,” she stated as if it were obvious, avoiding the disappointment he knew she was feeling.

“Why don’t you scoot over instead?” He replied squeezing her knee lightly. “I can’t help make the switch if you are sprawled out across the whole thing, now can I?”

She peered out at him from the tunnel as he leaned forward to her level, almost hovering over her. “You want to do this?”

“You know the ship. You helped design it. You’ve done you’re due diligence. I don’t have a reason not to trust that do I?”

“I—I don’t think so… But Shepard—“

“Will be told about it during the morning briefing,” Kaidan finished for her as he worked his way into the tunnel beside her.

She nodded as they began working. Laying on their backs working on the over head wiring and circuitry, they worked in tandem. It had become second nature for Kaidan to work alongside Reese. It had also become a favorite part of his duties when they allowed him to work with her. Especially one on one as they did now. No one to interrupt them, just the work and them.

“What were you thinking about earlier?” Reese asked not taking her eyes off her task. She often talked to him about random things as they worked; it was how they had gotten to know each other so well initially. Apparently because he actually listened and while having opinions of his own, he was never pushy about it.

He grinned. Would she punch him for his answer? He’d take the chance. “You.”

“ _Me_?”

“Yeah, just trying to figure out all the chaotic energy you have sometimes and why you put up with me,” he clarified as he reached for a tool.

His gaze caught hers as he noticed the slightest tinge of pink to her cheeks. “You don’t know?”

Her voice was just above a whisper. Know what? Had he missed something? Of course he had missed something, he thought in frustration. “Know what, Reese? What did I miss?”

She lowered her grey eyes. “Never mind.”

He sat down his tool and reached over to her, lifting her chin up with a hooked finger. “Don’t do that. Don’t hide what you want me to know.”

She took a breath. “I trust you and I…I like you.”

It was Kaidan’s turn to blush. All that flirting wasn’t just meaningless. He was happy. Happier than he’d been in a long time at hearing her words. With a dopey grin he replied in a hushed voice, “I like you too.”

She smiled broadly at him for a moment and then punched him playfully in the shoulder. “Can we get back to work now?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Alenko replied, both of them still wearing their dopey grins. Happiness came in all sorts of ways to a person. To him right now it was knowing that the woman next to him cursing at a circuit board liked him. For now that was enough.


	18. Substance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even with everything she had been through, everything she had accomplished, she still struggled to accept that she was worth recognition. That she could receive a promotion for legitimate reasons. That people weren’t just throwing her an award to make themselves look good.
> 
> He knew he’d seen the substance of her character, the real Kora Reese all those years ago on the SR1. He had fought for her twice, to remain on the Normandy and had not been disappointed either time. With each instance she had bucked up and not only met expectations but surpassed them. As with her current rank and assignment, she had earned them. No one had given them to her out of charity.
> 
> Maybe someday Reese would see that too. Until then he would continue to support her and give her a gentle shove in the right direction when doubts from her past threatened to take over. She was a person of substance whether she believed it or not. He believed it and knew it to be true.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (this is an extended scene from Chapter 19 of Broken Road)

**_Sunday, December 17, 2186, Kaidan’s Apartment, Citadel, Widow System, Serpent Nebula_ **

“What are you thinking about?” Kaidan asked as he made breakfast. Wanting to do something normal with Kori, he insisted on cooking breakfast. He had never envisioned using the cooking skills he picked up from Jump Zero to impress a woman.

Despite his best efforts and the wonderful night they had after dealing with Shepard’s clone, the Ops Officer seemed restless. In fact she seemed fidgety _and_ distant to the Specter. She had been fine, playful even when they had first woke up. Her mood had changed after checking her messages…

He watched Reese glance at him and then quickly turn back to the window. Stubbornly refusing to answer him, she played with the flatware on the counter in front of her. Alenko sighed. _And she says I’m stubborn._

“Okay, I know something is on your mind, but this is supposed to be time for _us_. Nothing else. So tell me already so we can deal with it and get back to just us,” he stated as he flipped the pancakes.

He looked at her expectantly as she remained silent. “ _KOOORRRIIII_!!!!”

“Okay! Fine!” she said fully aware he was not above using his puppy dog eyes on her. And she could never resist that look.

He continued to cook as she exhaled slowly. Finally she said, “I got a message this morning from Ad. Hackett. It was about the N7 program or rather the lack of one now…Apparently there’s groups of interspecies soldiers, mercs, techs, whatever forming and taking on missions to retake or defend different areas. Hackett is letting them call themselves unofficially N7 Special Forces or something. Says it’s good for moral all across the board.”

Kaidan nodded as he placed the pancakes on two plates. “Okay. Where do _you_ come in to all this?”

“I, um, well, since there’s no school to go to as it were, Hackett still wants to continue the training…and recruiting. Like Vega…He’s officially accepted the invite but there’s nowhere to train. So Hackett’s making some temporary changes—new recruits and ones still working their way up to N7 are going to be paired with an N7 as soon as possible…” she explained as Alenko cut his pancakes.

“I can see that. Shepard will be mentoring Vega as it were and you too I guess,” he said in a tone he knew indicated he still didn’t know why she was so bothered by the message.

Reese poked at her food and said softly, “Not exactly. They really want one trainee per N7, especially in Shepard’s case…and Vega is it.”

He frowned. “So who’s mentoring you? I can’t. I’m just a plain ol’ Specter, not an N7 badass turned Specter.”

“No, you’re an L2 badass turned Specter,” she replied with a grin.

“Kori! Who is—“ the sentinel trailed off as his whiskey colored eyes showed alarm. He felt his heart stop. They couldn’t. Hackett wouldn’t…“They aren’t reassigning you are they?”

She hesitated one moment too long as Kaidan dropped his fork. “They _can’t_ do that. Hackett knows you are too integral to the Normandy. No one knows the Reaper tech and code like you. The Normandy needs you. _I_ need you!”

The Major watched as she gave him a warm smile. He felt her hand grasp his and squeeze tightly. “Not even the Reapers could take me from you.”

“But—”

“Hackett reviewed the records of several N5 and N6 officers on a case by case basis and decided that some had already received advanced training due to their frontline status…I’m such a case, especially having served under Shepard _twice_ , having Anderson’s recommendation, and having what they are calling advanced biotics training from a certain Major in charge of the First Spec Ops Biotics Company,” she clarified.

He studied her carefully. There was still something else. It was a promotion of sorts, but he knew that she didn’t like flaunting let alone acknowledging promotions or awards of any kind. “You haven’t accepted have you?”

She shook her head no. Kaidan watched as she played with her food again. Finally he asked wanting to know the real reason, “Why haven’t you?”

Reese quickly locked eyes with him, her grey ones showing confusion. “I don’t understand…Why should I? You…You always said don’t take short cuts…”

“Kori, sweetheart, this isn’t a short cut or cheating. You’ve _earned_ this, especially with all the missions and training and responsibilities you’ve taken on,” he replied moving his hand to intertwine their fingers. “Besides how is it any different than me becoming a Specter? You supported me, and I’ll support you whatever you ultimately decide, but I think you should do it.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

Reese seemed lost in thought for a moment and then said, “Who’d have thought someone who was almost kicked off the Normandy for a past of insubordination would be an N7?”

“Isn’t that what the ‘N’ stands for?”

“Insubordination starts with an ‘I’ smart ass.”

Kaidan just grinned. “Eat your pancakes.”

“Yes, sir.”

He watched as she did just that. Even with everything she had been through, everything she had accomplished, she still struggled to accept that she was worth recognition. That she could receive a promotion for legitimate reasons. That people weren’t just throwing her an award to make themselves look good.

He knew he’d seen the substance of her character, the _real_ Kora Reese all those years ago on the SR1. He had fought for her twice, to remain on the Normandy and had not been disappointed either time. With each instance she had bucked up and not only met expectations but surpassed them. As with her current rank and assignment, she had earned them. No one had given them to her out of charity.

Maybe someday Reese would see that too. Until then he would continue to support her and give her a gentle shove in the right direction when doubts from her past threatened to take over. She was a person of substance whether she believed it or not. He believed it _and_ knew it to be true.

Kaidan grinned as he ate his pancakes. He’d seen the real Kori years ago, seen her change and grow, seen her become the woman she was today. And now he would spend the rest of his life making sure she remembered who she was and who she was meant to be.


	19. Blue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blue was defiantly her favorite color. It represented Kaidan. What he had gone through. What he had helped her through. What he promised and what he wanted their future to be. Blue would never be replaced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometime after chapter 22 broken road

Blue was Reese’s favorite color. And it had everything to do a certain L2 biotic. It was the color of his biotics when he flared. It began with lifting Jenkins in a demonstration of what biotics could do. The Lt. had been attempting to show the crew of the SR1 that there was nothing to fear from biotics. Some of them still had never served with one. Kaidan being Kaidan had always been adamant there was nothing to dread from biotics during the tenure of their mission.

Later she had noticed it on ground missions. And then she noticed it when he started coaching her on her biotics. His goal had been to get her to accept them and not fear them. Another time she noticed the color was after they had been together, and he used them while they were intimate. It had been the first time he’s done that with anyone. He’d been afraid that he might have hurt her or scared her. Reese assured him that the exact opposite was true

For Kora Reese, the color blue had come to mean safety and security. That meant that there was someone she could trust. Someone that could put up with all of her BS and someone who could see through her insecurities and give her strength. Even during his two-year absence from her life the color blue brought her a sense of peace. He had helped her accept her biotics and helped her through her anger.

While most biotics’ powers flared different shades of blue, Kaidan’s was her favorite. He was well aware of her thoughts on the hue of his biotics. She often made comments about how good he looked in _biotic_ _blue_. Even with subtle hints, he was still somewhat embarrassed by that. Eventually Kaidan had come to accept it and even like it. Just as with using his biotics in the bedroom, he enjoyed the fact that Kori _liked_ his biotics.

Before meeting Kaidan, biotics had been something to be fearful of. Something that could control her and define who she was supposed to be. The better part of her adult life had been spent like that instead of learning how to accept them as part of her. Kaidan had been instrumental in proving to her biotics were a tool to be used not something that would control your destiny. Even after the original Normandy was destroyed and Kaidan had left, she remembered what she had learned from him. She could be her own person and still have biotics

Using his experience training her on the SR1, Kaidan had been able to perfect a training program for Alliance biotics engaging in special operations. After they had reconnected on Earth she had even assisted in some of those classes. Aboard the original Normandy she would never have thought he would have been a teacher. Kaidan himself had even mentioned that. Yet on Earth and on the SR2, he was in charge of the first biotics special operations company made up completely of second-generation biotics.

Since their initial meeting aboard the original Normandy, Reese was impressed and surprised by the change, but they had both made progress. Kaidan was now a major with his own company specializing in biotics teaching them the _right_ way. She was a lieutenant commander and XO on the Normandy, an expert in reaper and Geth technology, and finally in control of her biotics instead of her biotics in control of her. It had been a crazy four years with so many changes and she had still found her way back to Kaidan.

Now they were engaged to be married after the end of the war. Her engagement ring was the color of Kaidan’s biotics. She suspected that was on purpose to give her a reminder that he would always be with her. That they would never be apart again. He had been adamant about that fact ever since they had agreed to try again.

Yes. Blue was defiantly her favorite color. It represented Kaidan. What he had gone through. What he had helped her through. What he promised and what he wanted their future to be. Blue would never be replaced.


	20. Shield

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They had become each other’s shield. A safe harbor away from the storms of life, even if just for a few moments. As Kaidan had come to phrase it, they were each other’s soft place to land. Kori couldn’t agree with him more. They had found home in each other. And that was worth fighting for. That was worth living for. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some time after chapter 25 of Broken Road

One of the first times. Kori had seen Kaidan use his biotics had been to shield her. They had been on a ground mission where she was supposed to provide tech support. He had been assigned to watch over her as she worked on hacking a Cerberus computer.He had accepted that responsibility knowing full well she was a biotic herself. He used his own barrier to help shield her as she did her task.

His willingness to protect her and fend off Cerberus at the same time impressed her. Kaidan was a impressive biotic and he was selfless and controlled. He never did anything for selfish reasons. He accepted responsibility for her on that mission with the purpose of ensuring she stayed alive. It wasn’t until later that she fully understood the depth of his character and biotic ability. That is what let her accept Kaidan’s efforts to finally understand that her biotic ability was a part of her and not to be treated like a disease.

The first time Kori provided a shield of any significance for Kaidan they had been yet on another Cerberus mission. Hackett had asked the Normandy to once again take care of another operation the pro-human group had in the works in the one of the remote sections of the Terminus System. Either way, Alenko had been providing cover fire for Shepard while Reese had been attempting to remote hack a turret. From her hiding spot she had glanced up to see a stray Cerberus trooper attempting to sneak up behind him. She had thrown up a barrier around him as she simultaneously threw a warp. The end result had been an unharmed Lt. Alenko and a smug but exhausted Reese.

Her quick action and her willingness to use her biotics to save him had not gone unnoticed by the L2. In fact it only made him more determined to train her. To help strengthen her endurance. To teach her not only how to use her biotics on the battle field but how to help her find peace. He began incorporating more Aikido teachings into their exercises. Believing that it might help her find peace amongst the anger she felt at all the injustices she had been apart of or witnessed.

Now years later on the SR2, through all the trials and tribulations the two had experienced, they had found their way back to one another. They not only served on the same ship again but were also set to be married. Not allowing the war to dictate their future, they planned to do everything within their power to win and have a life together. They were determined to have the life they had talked about before the original Normandy went down. The Reapers be damned.

In the weeks and months since they had reconnected on Earth after Shepard had turned himself in and turned over the Normandy to the Alliance, Reese and Alenko had grown closer but had also begun to get to know one another again. They relearned how to work with one another, how to trust one another, how to love one another again. The years apart had changed both of them but not beyond recognition to one another. If nothing else it had given them both an incentive to make things work this time. To make the most of their second chance. To finally have what they both had wanted on the SR1.

They had become each other’s shield. A safe harbor away from the storms of life, even if just for a few moments. As Kaidan had come to phrase it, they were each other’s soft place to land. Kori couldn’t agree with him more. They had found home in each other. And that was worth fighting for. That was worth living for. 


	21. Undercover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I just want to do something normal with you for once. I’ve been cooped up in the hospital for weeks and then on the Normandy. This is our first shore leave since I…since we…” he sighed dejectedly as he threw up his hands. “I just want to do something like we did on Earth…”
> 
> “Like we did on Earth,” she echoed curiously. “We could go out to eat and I think there is a naturescape somewhere that’s supposed to be like Earth we could hike through…I can look it up—”
> 
> She stopped as she noticed the sentinel looking over her shoulder towards a group of people. She glanced behind her. The group was a bunch of human civilians smiling like idiots and pointing in the two Normandy officers’ direction. She heard Kaidan mutter in frustration, “Not again.”
> 
> Reese quickly turned back to him. “Not again?”
> 
> “Yeah,” he replied as he shrugged. “When I picked up some supplied before I rejoined the Normandy, I was followed by a bunch of people. Turns out they recognized me from the Specter ceremony Udina insisted on plastering all over the media. I…They won’t leave me alone.”
> 
> “You have a fan club,” she giggled. “I can’t believe Joker was serious!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this takes place after chapter 4 of Broken Road

“You know…Being back on the Citadel so soon after the Cerberus attack feels weird,” Kaidan Alenko commented as he and Lt. Commander Kora Reese walked through the Presidium. The Normandy had returned for resupply and to update the Council on their progress so far against the Reapers.

Reese nodded as she motioned around them. “You can still see the remnants of the battle but people are still going about their lives…almost as if nothing had happened.”

“Well, Joker did mention the new Blasto movie was out,” Kaidan replied as he shouldered her gently. “We could go see it. You know, do normal things couples do…”

“You hate the Blasto movies,” Reese reminded him as they stood outside yet another shop. Not a clothing shop much to her relief. A tech shop, one he had mentioned while still in the hospital.

“Well, there’s not exactly a lot of choices in movies right now,” the Major complained as he crossed his arms.

Reese glanced up at him. “Are you annoyed?”

“I just want to do something normal with you for once. I’ve been cooped up in the hospital for weeks and then on the Normandy. This is our first shore leave since I…since we…” he sighed dejectedly as he threw up his hands. “I just want to do something like we did on Earth…”

“Like we did on Earth,” she echoed curiously. Reese glanced at the tech store at the omnitools that had caught his attention. “We could go out to eat and I think there is a naturescape somewhere that’s supposed to be like Earth we could hike through…I can look it up—”

She stopped as she noticed the sentinel looking over her shoulder towards a group of people. She glanced behind her, following his gaze. The group was a bunch of human civilians smiling like idiots and pointing in the two Normandy officers’ direction. She heard Kaidan mutter in frustration, “Not again.”

Reese quickly turned back to him. “Not again?”

“Yeah,” he replied as he shrugged. “When I picked up some supplied before I rejoined the Normandy, I was followed by a bunch of people. Turns out they recognized me from the Specter ceremony Udina insisted on plastering all over the media. I…They won’t leave me alone.”

“You have a fan club,” she giggled. “I can’t believe Joker was serious!”

“Kori!” Alenko complained as he glanced behind her again. “Damn it! They’re heading this way.”

“What? Seriously?” she asked as he gently pushed her around to see what he was witnessing. The crowd was starting to make their way towards them. Their voices chanting his name.

“Alenko! Alenko! Alenko!”

“No way,” she muttered both a little in awe and a little annoyed.

“Yes, way,” Kaidan corrected as he began tugging on her hand. “Let’s get out of here.”

Reese nodded as she let herself be pulled behind him. “Uh, yeah. Sure. But what are you going to do? We stupidly went out in our BDU’s.”

“Yeah. Not one of out brightest ideas,” he agreed. As he steered them through the crowd, more and more people seemed to be focusing their attention on them.

“Too bad I don’t have my tactical cloak,” she muttered as she heard people begin to mutter her name. Seriously? People knew her now too?

“That would only work for one of us,” Alenko reminded her as he rounded a corner, entering a corridor of clothing shops. “Your duel mod hasn’t worked yet.”

“Hey! It’s a process!” Reese snapped defensively as he jerked her into a shop. “Hey! Alenko, what the hell?”

“We need to go undercover,” he explained hurriedly. He quickly picked through a rack of hoodies.

As he pulled out two, one blue, one purple she realized they were in a novelty shop. One that showcased Blasto memorabilia. She shook her head as she heard the chant from outside the store grow louder. “Hell no, Alenko.”

“Alenko! Reese! Alenko! Reese!”

“It’s this or them, Kori,” he said as he offered her the purple one.

She made a face as she glanced over the racks to see the crowd outside the shop. Their voices echoing in the small space. “Alenko and Reese! Alenko and Reese!”

Kaidan had already ducked down and was putting on the blue hoodie. Opening his omnitool he quickly paid for both hoodies and a pair of matching ball caps. Reese growled on put on the hoodie and hat. “This is stupid! Why do they even know my name?”

“You haven’t seen the tabloids on ANN recently have you?” the Major asked as he adjusted his hat.

“No,” she confirmed as he moved to help her with her own hat.

“Apparently our relationship is good for ratings,” he murmured as he zipped up the purple hoodie for her.

Reese looked up at him, his eyes refusing to meet hers. “Kaidan?”

“Let’s just get the hell out of here,” he replied as he guided her through the maze of clothes racks by wrapping an arms around her waist. He wasn’t usually one to show that mush physical affection in public but at the moment he didn’t seem to care.

She played along as they neared the entrance to the store, the crowd of pursuers looking around for their lost prey. She wasn’t entirely sure of his plan but hopefully he had one…

“Don’t make eye contact. They’ll attack if you do,” he whispered as they made their way through the door.

Reese whispered back, “You are joking, right?”

“I don’t want to find out,” Kaidan replied with a smirk.

She rolled her eyes as they skirted around the crowd; Kaidan keeping a firm arm around her waist the whole time. Somehow they drew no attention as the crowd’s chant grew softer. After a few minutes, Kaidan pulled her into a empty side corridor and pushed her against the wall. She looked at him questioningly as he wrapped her arms around his neck. Nudging back the bill of her cap, he leaned into kiss her.

Reese tilted her head up to meet his lips as he hummed with contentment, his arms squeezing her gently to his chest. “I suppose we can never do anything normally.”

“Not when you’re a member of the Normandy’s crew and on Shepard’s team,” she agreed as he nuzzled her cheek.

“At least, we’re together,” he noted as the voices of their pursuers grew loud once again. He let out a frustrated growl. “Will they ever leave us alone?”

“Hey, you’re the Specter,” Reese teased as they both looked in the direction of the noise.

“And as humanity’s second Specter I suggest we begin going undercover when we go on shore leave from now on,” he stated as he once again grabbed her hand and tugged her away from the approaching crowd.

“Techboy, where are we—”

“We’re going to go undercover as two very devoted Blasto fans and watch the damned movie until those people leave us alone,” he growled as he continued to pull her towards a movie theater across the corridor.

“But you hate it—”

“Then I guess I’ll have to find better things to do in the dark with you,” he replied with a smirk as he paid for their tickets.

Reese arched an eyebrow. “Alenko, are suggesting being a bad boy in the theater?”

“Well, you sit in the back for stuff like that don’t you?” he asked as he motioned to the seats he had selected which were definitely in the back.

“Kaidan,” she said softly as they made their way to the theater.

The Major chuckled. “We can go undercover as two people who are totally into one another, ignoring everyone else while this incredibly annoying movie plays in the background.”

“I thought we _were_ totally into one another,” she commented as she squeezed his hand. “How is that being undercover?”

“Okay, fine. It’s the part about pretending to like Blasto that’s the undercover part,” he corrected as they found their seats.

“Okay. I can live with that,” she replied as she lifted up the arm between their seats, curling into Kaidan’s side.

“Kori?”

“You’ve never made out with a girl in a theater before?”

“Well, with a girl? Actually yes. A woman? The one I would do anything for? No,” he answered as he wrapped his arms around her, the movie starting.

“Maybe we should change that,” she offered as she glanced up at him, the opening credits ignored by both of them.

“I think I can help with that,” he said as he wrapped both arms around her, kissing her tenderly. “And later maybe we can continue under the covers…”

“Kaidan!”

“I want to be naughty with you for the rest of my life,” he murmured against her throat as he gave her feather light kisses.

She giggled in the darkness of the theater as a movie they both hated played in the distance. “I can live with that.”


	22. Red Sand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mars. The fourth planet in the Sol System. The ‘Red Planet.” Named after the Roman god of war. The first permanent settlement founded in 2103. Later known for a Prothean ruin that now might contain the means to defeat the Reapers. It was also the place the Illusive Man’s agent had stolen part of that data and nearly killed Kaidan.  
> Reese had been fascinated with the planet as a child. Even though not born on Earth, her parents ensured she knew of her roots. The planets and their history. As one of the first successful colonies for humans, she thought it was awesome that Protheans had also been there. Now, after recent events it was simply a ball of red sand to her. Nothing more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After chapter 6 of Broken Road

Reese glanced down at the lightly snoring body snuggled up to her side. Smiling she feathered her fingers through his short dark hair peppered with grey. Kaidan Alenko had fallen asleep after another bad migraine, his meds kicking in quickly but not before he wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his head against her thigh. Since being released from the hospital and rejoining the Normandy, he had been experiencing more intense headaches. He didn’t make a big deal about it. Then again he never had. That didn’t stop her from noticing it though.

This time, waiting well after she was sure he was out, she had brought up all of his medical records, both before and after the incident on Mars. Dr. Michele had been more than happy to share them, with the request Reese keep a close eye on him. Apparently, while he did check out, the good doctor was still concerned about what the head trauma could still do to his implant. Reese shared her concern.

The Lt. Commander took a measured breath as her fingers grazed over the Major’s amp. He could have died. He could have gone on that last-ditch mission to find something that would be able to defeat the Reapers and died there. She would never have seen him again. Everything they had been trying to rebuild would just have been gone. Promises could only get you so far. And his promise to come back to her had been a hair’s breadth from not happening.

She glanced down at him again as he moved against her, burrowing his face into her stomach. He had been reluctant to take the meds at first. Usually with a slight headache, she didn’t force the issue, but with a full-blown migraine she did. He’d given in after she promised not to leave.

Sharing quarters with anyone was still new to her. Sharing quarters with him was another experience entirely. They had talked about living together a few weeks before the Reapers attacked. Now they had quarters together on the Normandy. Granted that hadn’t been exactly what they had meant on Earth, but neither one of them was complaining. She wouldn’t complain, especially after what could have happened on Mars.

Mars. The fourth planet in the Sol System. The ‘Red Planet.” Named after the Roman god of war. The first permanent settlement founded in 2103. Later known for a Prothean ruin that now might contain the means to defeat the Reapers. It was also the place the Illusive Man’s agent had stolen part of that data and nearly killed Kaidan.

Reese had been fascinated with the planet as a child. Even though not born on Earth, her parents ensured she knew of her roots. The planets and their history. As one of the first successful colonies for humans, she thought it was awesome that Protheans had also been there. Now, after recent events it was simply a ball of red sand to her. Nothing more.

It was a place she would never go again if she had anything to say about it. Even if they won, even if the Prothean data trove still remained after the war, she would never go there. That planet had nearly taken Kaidan’s life. Something she forcible made herself forget each day. It was easier now that he shared quarters with her, that he was back abroad the Normandy, that she woke up to his face each morning and fell asleep to it each night.

But to her, Mars was no longer a place to be fascinated with or a place to hold in high regard. It was a place that represented death to her. Mars, the god of war, would not claim another person she cared for. The planet was simple red sand to her. As dangerous as the biotic drug itself. It was nothing worth her time.

The man clinging to her in his sleep was everything now. Everything that she wanted and needed. Every hope that she had that things could be as they should have been nearly 3 years ago. They were together now, and she would be damned if anything came between them again.

Glancing at the most recent medical report from Doctor Chakwas, Reese saw that the swelling Dr. Michele had been worried about in the hospital had completely subsided. There was still the fact that the incident on Mars had indeed rattled his implant as Kaidan liked to say. It meant in layman’s terms that the implant had moved around in his thick head more than it had ever been meant to. It was an L2 implant to boot with a notorious history of problems. Even L2’s with no history of complications upon or immediately after implantation, were at risk of difficulties further down the road. Reese knew he had been lucky so far to experience none at all. But after Mars…

She kept her concerns to herself. They faced enough problems at the moment without adding what if’s to it. She would continue to monitor his medical reports both with and without his knowledge. He probably knew she was doing it anyway. At some point when he felt like telling her about his more frequent migraines, they would talk. Until then, she would trust him.

Red sand of any kind would not be the end of the Major. He was too stubborn and strong willed to allow that. And she was too obstinate to allow it either.

Reese put away the reports and untangled herself from Kaidan. Slipping down onto the mattress beside him, she rested her head on his chest. His heart beat was strong and steady. He was real and alive and with her. And as his arms wound back around her, that was all that mattered to the Lt. Commander.

Kaidan was alive and with her.


	23. Boot Camp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He smiled to himself. 15 years after Brain Camp he was teaching another biotic how to better control their abilities. Biotic Boot camp Kori called it. Whatever you called, it wasn’t what had had thought he would be doing at age 32.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place after the flashback scene in chapter 10 of Broken Road

__

_**Teach me. Make me a stronger, better biotic and in the process maybe show me how this patience thing works and when to use it.** _

_Those had been Kori’s words weeks ago after Shepard had dressed her down for getting hurt on a ground mission when it could have been prevented. By all accounts, the Commander would have been well within his rights to bust her back down to ensign and write her up for a disciplinary referral. It wouldn’t have been the first on the L3’s record. But instead, Shepard had come to Kaidan with an idea. He asked if the L2 could work with her on her biotics and her patience. Apparently the Lt.’s opinion carried more weight than he had initially thought with his CO. Was it possible that Shepard also knew about his feelings for Reese?_

_Whatever the reasoning for Shepard’s request, Kaidan had agreed and began with giving her a piece of his mind. In the end, she had asked him to train her. Another biotic wanted him to train her. One that hated her biotics and had a knack for being impulsively stupid sometimes. It was a challenge. Most of the time he liked challenges but this time it involved a person he had come to care about against regs. He shouldn’t even be thinking about her like that let alone engaging in a secret relationship with her. Sure they were all under pressure on the mission to stop Saren and the Geth but that was no excuse._

_He watched as Lt. Kora Reese repeated the stances and positions he had shown her, her biotics flaring around her in a purplish hue. He had blocked off the Normandy’s gym for an hour at Shepard’s suggestion. During the weeks since she had been shot by Cerberus troops, he had started out slow, showing her the basics. It reminded him of his first aikido the biotics._

_Maybe eventually he’d show her more advanced techniques but for now his goal was to show her that patience with her biotics would in the end serve her better than hating them. He hoped she would come to accept them as a part of her and would no longer allow them to control her._

_Reese finished the first set of exercises and powered down her biotics as she turned to look at him with a smirk. “Enjoying the view, Lt.?”_

_He felt a smirk of his own tug at his lips as he replied, “Always, Lt.”_

She gave him a look as she crossed her arms. “Are you going to just watch me or are you going to show me more stuff?”

He tilted his head. He had never truly pictured himself a teacher, instructing anyone in how to control their biotics. Yet here he was aboard the Alliance’s most advanced war ship, showing the woman who he had come to care about greatly, how to control her biotics instead of those abilities controlling her.

“I could show you more _stuff_ as you say but why don’t we practice that exercise one more time _together_ ,” he offered as he walked towards her.

“Why? I thought I did it right.”

“You did,” he confirmed. “I just thought you might want to get used to working with someone else using their biotics.”

As they took up the beginning position, Reese stated matter-of-factly, “I’m already use to your biotics, Kaidan.”

She began the exercise as he paused, her admission catching him off guard. No one had ever said they were used to his biotics before. Each biotic gave off their own unique energy. It was how he intuitively knew someone was a biotic without being told or seeing their amp.

He blinked and quickly caught up with her, flaring his own blue biotics as he mimicked her movements. Blue and purple fields glowing within inches of each other but never sparking or resisting each other. It was as if their biotics were also in synch not just their movements. He had never experienced that before. With other biotics he had worked with, there was always a spark of resistance when they were in close proximity to one another. With Reese there was none…

He smiled to himself. 15 years after Brain Camp he was teaching another biotic how to better control their abilities. Biotic Boot camp Kori called it. Whatever you called, it wasn’t what had had thought he would be doing at age 32.

He was the head of the Marine detachment on the Alliance’s most advanced war ship. He was a highly decorated officer in his own right. He was a model biotic for the Alliance, and he was one of the most sought after tech officers to boot.

At 17, he would never have believed he could have achieved any of that after Jump Zero even with what his father had told him. Yet once again his dad had been right. _This_ next time was bigger and better.

And he had achieved it on his own terms.

His whiskey colored eyes fell upon the woman in front of him. If he could teach her just a little bit of what he’d learned since Jump Zero, maybe he could help other biotics. The Alliance Ascension program was a start but maybe he could do something to contribute. To teach kids how to control their biotics the _right_ way.

Either way, it would have to wait until after the mission to stop Saren. He had lots of things to keep him busy in the meantime. He’d learned some hard lessons but maybe just maybe things were finally looking up and he could have a future on his own terms.

Maybe…


	24. Enemies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So how did she know he was down there? Alenko screwed his eyes shut and grimaced. Shepard had seen him go to the elevator as the Cmdr. had headed to his cabin. By now he had to know that the relationship between the two Lt.’s wasn’t just professional. They had those few stolen moments in the Mako and the extra training he was giving Reese with her biotics. Of course his CO had called her…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the flashback during Chapter 11 of Broken Road

_**2183, SSV Normandy SR1** _

_“Kaidan?” a soft voice called through the cargo bay. No one else was in the bay. Of course they weren’t it was nearly midnight. No one was scheduled to do any work on the night shift …at least this time for once they were all caught up on the repairs and maintenance._

_So how did she know he was down there? Alenko screwed his eyes shut and grimaced. Shepard had seen him go to the elevator as the Cmdr. had headed to his cabin. By now he had to know that the relationship between the two Lt.’s wasn’t just professional. They had those few stolen moments in the Mako and the extra training he was giving Reese with her biotics. Of course his CO had called her…_

_“Here,” he called as loud as he dared without causing anymore discomfort. He didn’t want to take pills for a small headache. Some quiet and soft light would do it. Or so he had thought. It wasn’t one of his killer migraines, but he still hurt like hell._

_He still held his eyes shut as he heard someone slowly enter the Mako and slide into the back-bench seat beside him. He had chosen the Mako because it helped block out some of the extra noise and because no one was around to question him or try to send him to medbay. But now she was there…_

_The sentinel knew that she was watching him carefully; looking for any indication of what he wanted her to do. He wasn’t sure_ what _to do. He hadn’t planned on her finding him. He still wasn’t used to having someone care about him beyond the mission or medical profession._

_Instead of waiting for him to tell her what to do, he felt her slide into the cramped floorboard and inch her way in between his legs. Kaidan opened his eyes only to see her smiling at him. “Close your eyes,” she breathed as she gently placed her fingers against his temples._

_He complied and grimaced slightly until she started massaging the sides of his head. Almost instantly the pain began subsiding a little. He sighed as she asked, “Like this?”_

_He had only briefly mentioned the technique to her a few weeks ago without actually showing her. Apparently she had done some research on her own. “Ah, yeah.”_

_She hummed in contentment, glad that she was able to provide him some relief as she kissed his forehead. They remained like that for several long minutes; Kaidan occasionally offering a guiding hand on different ways to help drive away the pain, her fingers doing the work with little effort, as if they already knew exactly what to do._

_When his headache was just a dull pain, barely registering to him, he ran his hands down her arms, moving them to her waist. He looked up at her with whiskey colored eyes and said, “Thank you. You didn’t have to come down here just because…”_

_“I know. I_ wanted _to,” she replied as she moved her hands to cup his face. He hadn’t had a chance to shave, as the stubble lightly scraped her palms._

_“Shepard?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Figures.”_

_She smiled at him as he leaned in and gently kissed her. He moved to her ear and whispered, “I know you’re exhausted from the training and the mission earlier…I don’t want you to burn out worrying about me.”_

_“Helping you if I can is not going to burn me out…At least it’s something I can control. I can help you with your headaches or work or_ something _…”_

_Alenko pulled back and studied her carefully. Her tone of voice told him something more was meant with that statement. “Something you can control?”_

_She sighed knowing she had said the wrong thing. Now he was going to worry and start asking questions she didn’t want to answer. “It doesn’t matter, Kaidan. Forget about it.”_

_She attempted to get up from the floorboard but his strong grip on her waist prevented that. “Kori,_ what _is it? Every time biotics are brought up you tense up or shut down. I can’t figure it out…You aren’t worried about me being an L2 are you?”_

_He looked at her in the eye, waiting for an answer. She had never treated him differently because he was an L2, but she didn’t talk about it either. She looked back at him for half a second and then glanced away. Kaidan felt all the forbidden hopes he had placed in his unconventional relationship with her suddenly evaporate._

_She_ did _think he was a threat…”It is because I’m an L2…”_

_His hands fell from her waist and he slumped against the seat. “I would never hurt you…_ ever _…I’m not like that…I can’t be. I won’t be…I’m not a monster…”_

_Suddenly the sentinel felt arms wrap around his neck as he looked up. He found Reese leaning up, almost laying on him, embracing him. He looked down at her, confused. His hands involuntarily went back around her waist. “Reese?”_

_“I’m sorry, Kaidan. I know you’re not a monster. You’re a good man. You’re the best man I’ve ever met. But it’s not fair…”_

_“What’s not fair?” he asked hesitantly, still not sure he knew what was going on._

_“You shouldn’t have to worry about always staying in control because of what Conatix did…” she whispered into his shoulder._

_He frowned. Conatix’s involvement in the appearance of first-generation biotics had never been widely published let alone officially acknowledged. How did she know about it? He hadn’t really talked about Jump Zero with anyone either except with Shepard. “Kori, what exactly are you talking about?”_

_She shook her head and pulled away from him. He quickly moved his hands to her face, forcing her to look at him. “I need to know. What do you know?”_

_She closed her eyes and took a breath. “Conatix was responsible for most of the accidental exposures to humans, producing the first generation of human biotics…Those kids born like you…”_

_“Yeah, they were…A lot didn’t survive…and others, well they might as well not have,” he confirmed as he looked at her. There was still something else._

_Instead of questioning her, he offered, “I—My mom was exposed to eezo during an accident in Singapore when she was pregnant with me…I hit puberty and a couple suits show up to take me away to Jump Zero for training with a Turian. Stuff happened and the Brain Camp was shut down…Conatix went bankrupt and the Alliance began a “better” training program for human biotics. I wasn’t invited.”_

_Reese looked at him with a little bit a surprise. She hadn’t expected him to share that with her. It was one of the secrets of his past she thought would remain that way to her. When she remained silent, Kaidan pulled her gently into the seat beside him. “It was shut down because I…lost control and killed the instructor. I was trying to ‘protect’ a girl and I guess I let loose with a full biotic kick…broke the turian’s neck…scared the girl…the one I thought I had something special with…”_

_With that confession, he half expected Reese to flee from the Mako, leaving him as he had been after Jump Zero, utterly alone. Instead she laid her head against his shoulder and held his hand tightly. He looked down at her as she said, “That’s why you’re so controlled and introspective.”_

_After a few silent moments, she moved to wrap his arm around her as she rested her other hand against his chest. He felt contented knowing she was beside him and not fleeing for her life after his confession. He found that he felt as if a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders he had been unaware of as he fumbled with her fingers._

_“Conatix officially went out of business, but they still existed as a shadow organization funded by somebody very powerful,” Reese said softly._

_Kaidan frowned. He had heard those rumors but never paid them much mind, instead focusing on training and controlling his biotics on his own. “You believe that?”_

_“And you don’t? The accidents continued after Jump Zero shut down…just not on Earth,” she said, her tone indicating she was slightly hurt at his skepticism._

_“Well, no, maybe. I don’t know…” he said honestly._

_“Well, I do. I’m a result of their ‘accidents’ just like you,” she replied looking up at him defiantly._

_“Reese—“_

_“Kaidan, listen. Please? Look, I’m not from Earth, not originally. I’m from Moirae, the first and only planet terraformed using the Destiny plan. Because of the way the terraforming was done, eezo had to be shipped under quarantine guidelines through the upper atmosphere. There was a shuttle leak engineered to happen but not at that altitude. Instead of a ‘normal’ accident that was supposed to have happened, Conatix supercharged the nano-machines working to create oxygen in the upper atmosphere and destroyed the colony. There were greater numbers of the nanites the higher you went to help create and maintain the atmosphere. Everyone was exposed to super high levels of eezo because we all breathed in the nanites everyday with every breath. It was too much for most of the colony…Only 5% of us survived and every one of us developed biotics within 6 months. All teenagers between 12 and 15 with no families left thanks to them.”_

_Alenko let the statements set in for several long minutes. He had never heard her voice so full of venom. She believed every word that she had told him and knowing her she had done her homework to prove it._

_He hooked a finger under her chin and said,” I believe you, Kori.”_

_Relief filled her as he leaned in and kissed her. “Kaidan, I—“_

_“Don’t let your hatred for them cloud your judgment. You’re an amazing woman who can do so much good…I know you’ve already made your family proud.”_

_“Kaidan, why do you always know what to say?”_

_“A gift?” he offered as he gave her a cheeky grin. “It only seems to work when I’m alone with you though.”_

_“Maybe that’s a sign…”_

_“I think I like that kind of sign.”_


	25. Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Kora looked out the window of the room her grandmother had given her, Kora looked out over the rolling hills and woods that surrounded the house. The room had once belonged to her mother. Now it was hers. It still didn’t feel like home. She wondered if it ever would. She loved her Gran but it wasn’t the same…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pre-Mass Effect 1, Broken Road Timeline

**_2169, outside Atlanta, Georgia, Earth, Sol System_ **

Lost. That was what she felt. There was no other explanation, no other word for what she was feeling. But it wasn’t just a feeling; it was a state of being.

Just a few short weeks ago, 15-year-old Kora Reese had lost her home, her family, everything she thought she knew. A ship not following quarantine procedures had blown up in the upper atmosphere of her colony. The eezo in the drive core had disbursed throughout the colony’s atmosphere, infusing the air with super high levels of eezo. On any other colony, the result might not have been so bad, but on Moirae there was a reason element zero had to travel through the atmosphere in such careful fashion.

Moirae was a planet that had been terraformed using the Destiny Plan. This technique involved using specialized nanites to convert the toxic atmosphere into a breathable one. One draw back was that they did not react well with eezo, hence the quarantine requirements. When the unshielded drive core blew, it supercharged the nanites resulting in the colonists being exposed to deadly levels of eezo. The except to that was a handful of teens roughly in her age range that had survived. Everyone else perished, including her parents.

As she looked out the window of the room her grandmother had given her, Kora looked out over the rolling hills and woods that surrounded the house. The room had once belonged to her mother. Now it was hers. It still didn’t feel like home. She wondered if it ever would. She loved her Gran but it wasn’t the same…

“Kora? You have a visitor,” a soft female voice called from the doorway. It was her grandmother. She had been giving her space and was always nearby if needed.

“Who? I don’t wanna answer any more stupid questions about mom and dad’s work,” the teen protested angrily. “It wasn’t their fault the colony…Just because they came up with the nanites, that doesn’t make it their fault.”

“And it’s not,” a deep male voice confirmed.

Reese turned around to see a tall man wearing Alliance BDU’s standing beside her grandmother. It was Commander Anderson, the one who had lead the mission to Moirae. The man who hadn’t been afraid of her and the other survivors.

Her grandmother said, “I’ll leave you two alone. I’m sure there are somethings you need to discuss. But Kora, remember you are never truly lost as long as someone remembers

who you are.”

Kora frowned as her gran left, leaving the Commander to gaze at her and then around her round. “May I come in?”

She nodded as he stepped into her room and closed the door. “I—I thought you’d be on the Hastings—”

“I was, but I have an ungodly amount of shore leave built up and decided to spend some of it,” Anderson explained as he moved to stand beside her in front of the window.

“And you come here?”

“Yes. Is that a problem?”

“It is if you are just gonna do what everyone else has and feel sorry for me and tell me all this will go away and—”

“It won’t go away. Not completely,” Anderson corrected her. “It will fade. It will hurt less. But it will always still be there.”

Kora looked at him with narrowed eyes. “So you’re not here to coddle me? Then you must be here to get more info about my parents—”

“Drs. Connor and Rayne Reese were the foremost authorities in terraforming nanite technology. They were the masterminds behind the Destiny Plan and the settling of Moirae,” Anderson interrupted. “Nothing I have found has led me to believe they would have anything to do with the destruction of that same colony. They are the one’s that instituted the quarantine protocols for eezo to begin with. They were working on safer ways to transport it as well.”

“You—You believe that?”

The Commander nodded. “Don’t you?”

“I—Yes,” she said as she lowered her eyes. It wasn’t her parents’ fault, but someone still caused it.

“Then believe my when I tell you, there is a third party working responsible,” Anderson said. “They are interested in what eezo exposure results in.”

“Biotics,” Kora muttered as she raised her hand, a faint purple glow emanating from it.

“I’m afraid so,” he said. “You’re a smart kid. I’ve looked at your test scores and your academics. You were actually starting to help you parents in their lab…I thought you should know that all the other survivors have begun to exhibit biotics as well…Apparently, all of you are second exposure…It means—”

“We were all exposed earlier somehow and just didn’t know it,” she finished.

He nodded. “You’ll eventually be told through official channels but because of your…unique connection to all this I thought you should know first.”

She nodded. Yep. Lost was a good word. Lost everything including being normal. She looked up. “Why are you really here?”

“To check on the kid who kept a level head during the whole thing. The kid you found all the survivors and coordinated efforts to gather them in one place, to keep them safe until help arrived,” Anderson said. “To check on the kid who stared down a marine detachment and yelled at them to help or get out of the way.”

“Well, they were just standing there,” Kora murmured, “Looking stupid.”

“I suppose they did,” he agreed. “We weren’t expecting to just find teens and well coordinated ones at that…”

“I never thanked you,” she replied. “I mean, you were the one who didn’t treat us like…freaks.”

“You don’t need to thank me,” Anderson said. “But if you feel the need to, all I want is for you not to let this mark you. You’re a smart kid. You’ve got a lot of potential. Use it. Make your parents proud. And maybe that Gran of yours too.”

“I don’t know how…”

“You’ll figure it out,” he said handing her a contact card. “If you ever need anything, call me.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“But why—”

“You’re Gran said it best: you’re never really lost as long as someone remember who you are.”


	26. Purple

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Purple had never really meant anything to him before. Now it meant everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After chapter 9 of Messages

Purple had never held any real significance for Kaidan Alenko until he met Kora Reese. Her biotics were purple, an unusual occurrence for humans. It had something to do with the way her second exposure to eezo had happened. At least that was how both Chakwas and Reese had explained it to him.

His mom had been into the meanings of colors for as long as he could remember. It was something of a hobby. She liked plants too and usually chose them based on the color. She was known for giving flowers and plants as gifts using the color to signify something appropriate for the occasion or the person. He supposed some of that had rubbed off on him.

As he watched Kori work with a small group of his students, he couldn’t help but compare the flare of her biotics to the color’s meanings that his mother had talked about. Purple was a secondary color at its most basic level, made up of blue and red. The former embodied calmness and stability while the latter personified fierce energy. Put them together and it was a ball of chaotic energy. That fit Reese to a tee.

The color was also known to be associated with impatience and powerlessness. Unfortunately, Reese suffered from both of those on occasion. During the two years since the destruction of the SR1, she seemed to have tempered those traits quite a bit. But as they got to know one another again, he recognized those tendencies were still there, simply better controlled and in some cases hidden.

On the other hand, the color could symbolize a great imagination and remarkable creativity. That was definitely Kori too. She had been cited numerous times for original thinking and problem solving. Of course she’d gotten in trouble several times for the same thing. Either way, Kori was unorthodox when it came to several things including their relationship. It was something that he had been drawn to almost from the start. Now he just enjoyed being kept on his toes.

Kaidan watched as she used one of the Aikido stances he had taught her on the SR1 to illustrate a biotic technique he hadn’t taught her. He smiled. On the SR1, he never would have seen himself as a teacher to an entire class of second-generation biotics. Neither could he have imagined Kori helping him, especially with how impatient she could be sometimes.

Things changed. People changed. But some things—a precious few things—stayed the same. Kori’s tenacity, her stubbornness, her compassion, and her sense of humor were still there. She had grown as a person but still flared the same purple glow she always had. The color was the same, but her biotics were stronger. But she was still the same person.

As the group of students hooted and hollered about the target Kori had just destroyed with a powerful warp, the Major grinned. They egged him on about having a girlfriend but now she was a badass biotic to them. She was much more to him than that and this time he aimed to make sure she knew that.

Purple had never really meant anything to him before. Now it meant everything.  
  



	27. Trauma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was almost the same as Brain Camp. He’d done the thing he thought was right at the time. The result was a death. Vyrnnus he’d killed accidentally in defense of another. Shepard was dead because he’d obeyed an order. Actions had consequences. Even actions with good intentions. His father had taught him that lesson not long after Jump Zero. But it still stung.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place after the flashback in Chapter 1 of Messages

_Kaidan reached for her and pulled her back to him quickly. He held her to his chest, an arm wrapped tightly around her waist, the other tangled in her long dark hair. He buried his face in her shoulder and whispered, “I’m no good for you like this, Reese. I’ll just hurt you like I hurt everyone I care about. I don’t want that. I want you to be happy.”_

_Reese held on to him just as tightly as she said, “I am happy. You make me happy. Being with you is helping me get through everything. Why do you think you’ll hurt me?”_

_“Because that’s what I do. I hurt people and let them down. And Shepard is dead because of it,” he said as he pulled away. “I want better for you…”_

_“Kaidan,” she said as she got a bad feeling. “Don’t—“_

_“I’m sorry,” the L2 replied as he kissed her tenderly. “I’m sorry. You’re better off without me, Kori.”_

_“Kaidan, don’t…please.”_

_She watched as he walked away without acknowledging her plea. He hesitated as he reached the door and then said, “You mean the world to me. I can’t let anything happen to you because of me.”_

_~~~~~_

_The tree fell to the ground with a thunderous crash. The sounds of startled wildlife scurried deeper into the woods. For the moment, the L2 biotic felt as if he were the only one in the entirety of the Northshore Mountains. It was his own doing, but it was better that way…_

_As the energy faded from the warp, his biotics continued to flare. He’d lost everything. Everything he had come to value in the last 6 months. The Normandy was gone. Destroyed by an unknown enemy. Members of his crew killed. His CO, his friend dead, sacrificing himself to save the rest. And now the woman he believed he had come to love._

_Maybe not all of it was entirely his fault but he could have done more. He could have disobeyed Shepard’s order and gone after him. He might have been able to save Shepard, but he hadn’t. Now a good man was dead while Kaidan stood in the forest near his cabin tossing warps at innocent plant life._

_He growled and looked down at his still glowing hands. Fisting them, he screwed his eyes shut. He had failed Shepard and his crew. If he had simply disobeyed, at least there would have been a chance to save Shepard. But no. Instead he had been the good little soldier that let his CO and friend be killed…_

_It was almost the same as Brain Camp. He’d done the thing he thought was right at the time. The result was a death. Vyrnnus he’d killed accidentally in defense of another. Shepard was dead because he’d obeyed an order. Actions had consequences. Even actions with good intentions. His father had taught him that lesson not long after Jump Zero. But it still stung._

_His mother said he was suffering from trauma. Psychological trauma. Survivor’s guilt. She was a psychologist. Who was he to argue with her? Maybe she was right but that didn’t make him wrong. He could have chosen differently but he hadn’t._

_And if he couldn’t make the right choices, what good was he to anyone?_

_How could he be with Kori? How could he be worthy of her, keep her safe, be what she needed when he couldn’t make the right calls?_

_His mom said he would eventually work through his sense of loss, his guilt, his self-blame. That he would think differently then and shouldn’t make any hasty decisions in the meantime._

_He didn’t consider anything he’d done hasty. He was protecting others from himself. Kori would be better without him. It would hurt now but she would be free to find someone worthy of her. Someone able to give her what she needed without doing things wrong._

_Kaidan looked up at the sky as he opened his eyes. Trauma or not, cutting ties with Kori would protect her. She could be happy. Eventually. Maybe he would never find such happiness again, but he would sacrifice that for her. He could at least do that right._


	28. Peace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His cabin, now their cabin, had been the place they had both been fighting to get back to. It was more than a cabin to them. Kori had been the first person he had ever brought to it and the only one he had ever considered sharing it with. And now through some miracle of the galactic proportions he would get that chance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before chapter 30 of Broken Road

“It’s still standing,” Kori murmured in amazement.

“Yeah,” Kaidan breathed with a sigh of relief.

EDI had shown him the orbital photos of his cabin just a few days before. There was damage to the surrounding woods, the mountains scarred by stray Reaper beams, but the cabin itself was essentially unharmed. The Normandy’s AI surmised that Chanter’s Peak had been far enough north that the Reaper’s attack on Vancouver caused little to no damage.

A nearby tree had toppled onto the back part of the cabin, only causing superficial damage. It looked as if the rest of the cabin suffered from minimal cosmetic damage. It could be fixed. It could be repaired. It could be rebuilt.

Kaidan moved towards the place that had been his refuge from the storms of life for more than a decade. It still stood. And now he intended for it to be more. He intended for it to be a home. His home with Kori.

As he walked slowly up the incline towards the cabin, finally free of his crutches, he closed his eyes, thankful for small miracles. He had nearly lost his life so many times on the mission to stop the reapers. Mars. Every ground mission. The Cerberus attack on the Citadel. Cronos Station. Earth where a Mako had nearly killed him when it rolled over after being hit by reaper fire. Instead he had only received a broken leg and a few bruised ribs. Yet he had survived and stood with Kori in the place that had come to represent peace for them both.

His cabin, now their cabin, had been the place they had both been fighting to get back to. It was more than a cabin to them. Kori had been the first person he had ever brought to it and the only one he had ever considered sharing it with. And now through some miracle of the galactic proportions he would get that chance.

He felt Reese walk up beside him and nudge him with her shoulder. “You okay there, techboy?”

“Yeah,” the Major replied as he carefully wrapped an arm around her shoulders, mindful of her arms. They were still bandaged from the accident on the Normandy. EDI had been able to find several specialists to help both with the burns and the nerve damage and her progress was on track. She still suffered from phantom pains and hyper-sensitivity on occasion.

“Are you sure? You just kind of stopped,” she commented looking up at him with concerned grey eyes.

He glanced down at her as he moved a strand of dark shoulder length hair from her face. EDI and Traynor had done an excellent job finding a cut that complimented her as well as one she would agree to wear. While he liked the shorter cut, he missed her long locks. The same electrical fire near EDI’s central processing core had been responsible for singing her hair to mismatched lengths. EDI had insisted on correcting that problem.

“I just…It’s surreal that we made it back here,” Kaidan admitted. “I…I sometimes wondered if we would…If _I_ would.”

“You thought you might not make it?” Kori asked in shock.

“I thought that if I didn’t, that at least you would,” he murmured, refusing to meet her gaze.

“ _Me_? What about _you_? I didn’t want to face a future without you.” Her tone clearly indicating she was not at all happy with his confession.

“I know, sweetheart. It’s just sometimes the dark part of war overshadows the hope we hang onto,” he said lowering his head.

He felt her gauze-covered hand graze his cheek. Looking up at her, he saw a smile. “But we both made it back and we get to live together now. Here. On Earth. In a cabin you made. We made it home.”

Kaidan pulled her to him gently as he kissed her cheek. “Do you think we finally found some peace?”

She chuckled. “If you count living with and loving me peaceful, then sure.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way, Kori. I love you.”

“Love you too, techboy. Always.”


	29. Legacy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaidan wouldn’t let Jump Zero repeat. Not while he was alive and in charge of a project like this. He would make sure that these kids had a better experience than he did. They would benefit from the mistakes he had experienced during BAAT, letting them be trained the right way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before Messages

An Instructor.

Kaidan Alenko was an instructor to a select group of second-generation biotics. While accidental exposure to eezo still occurred, it was more common now for humans to gain their biotics through heredity. That was the case for every single student he and Anderson had handpicked for this project.

The Major was charged with seeing to the further training of those biotics and making them into a cohesive unit. It had been pitched to Anderson by Hackett as an alternative to the Alliance’s Ascension program. These biotics were already enlisted in the military and had been vetted by Anderson as suitable candidates. Kaidan had the final say on whether they joined the group or not. That was after the L2 had agreed to accept the job in the first place.

When the idea had originally been pitched to him, Kaidan had been skeptical. His experiences from Brain Camp ever present in the back of his mind. They were talking about militarizing biotics for the Alliance, something that BAAT had been rumored to be designed to do. Kaidan had never wanted that for any biotics and nearly rejected the proposal. It wasn’t until Anderson had brought up Reese and what she had been able to accomplish since her training with him on the SR1 that he realized what Anderson and Hackett actually wanted to do.

Neither Admiral wanted biotics to be thrown under the bus so to speak. They weren’t lobbying to recruit underage biotics into a training program. They were wanting to use those who had already joined the Alliance and put their talents to use. They would work in a group, as a unit to support each other not compete against one another. They would learn to use their biotics to protect others and help support other military units.

He had been able to train one other biotic, to help her understand that biotics were nothing to be afraid of and that they didn’t have to control you. Reese had been a quick study and an excellent student despite her impatience. According to Anderson she had excelled in her assignments since the SR1 and reportedly employed her biotics more in the field. While he felt a sense of pride that he had at least been able to do that right where she was concerned, he still knew he had other things that he regretted and wished to correct in regard to her. But that was a different issue.

He stood in the room that would serve as the classroom. There was a gym area next door for biotic exercises they would use later. It was nothing like Jump Zero. He had ensured that. Granted these kids were in the military and had already completed boot camp and possibly already a field assignment, but that didn’t mean it had to feel sterile or uninviting. It was all decorated within Alliance regs, but it was welcoming. It had to be to make the right impression.

Kaidan wouldn’t let Jump Zero repeat. Not while he was alive and in charge of a project like this. He would make sure that these kids had a better experience than he did. They would benefit from the mistakes he had experienced during BAAT, letting them be trained the right way.

That’s the legacy he wanted to leave behind. Yes he was the poster boy for biotics as Reese used to point out. Yes he was a model soldier and had several awards and citations proving that. Yes he was the one Anderson and Hackett had proposed the project to. All of that was important but nothing would overshadow his desire to make things better for biotics. The Ascension project was a good start and maybe someday he would be more directly involved with it but for now, showing second-gens in the Alliance how biotics could be used was his focus.

He would show them, the Alliance, and everyone else that human biotics were here to stay and were something to be appreciated not feared. He wanted his legacy to be one of hope for biotics, for humans in general. He wanted both those with and without biotics not to fear each other, to understand each other. He wanted humanity to accept biotics as just another thing that made their species wonderful and amazing.

As an instructor he would teach the next generation of biotics about hope and he would do it his way. That would be his legacy.


	30. End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kora Reese was the one that got away. More accurately, he had let her get away thinking he was doing the right thing. Now a little over two years later, he knew for a fact he had been wrong. He had been an idiot. How could leaving her like he had been the best thing for either of them? It hadn’t been. He had been miserable for months after leaving her until he finally threw himself into his work again, ignoring that pain. But no matter what he did, it was still there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (This takes place prior to Messages. The letter is from chapter 14 of Broken Road.)

_Alenko—_

_I’m sure you remember me. Mike Westmore—the punk from Brain Camp that teased you about Rahna. She liked you better than me anyway. We ended up doing a tour of duty together once you finally decided to get a paycheck for those big biotic muscles of yours. Somehow we became friends through all that. Either way, what happened at Jump Zero never should have happened to us kids but because of that you showed me that being a cocky, arrogant biotic is a very bad thing. You showed the military what a true biotic soldier should be. You’re an example for all of us with or without the L2 implant. I owe you a lot. You’re a hell of a soldier and not because of the biotics._

_You may or may not know, but I’m part of Shepard’s ragtag team to save the universe this time. Thought it was my turn since you had yours last time. This is my choice, my chance to do my part. There is a chance this is a one-way trip as we’re heading through the Omega 4 Relay after we get all the people and equipment we need to hit the Collectors where they live. The thing is we all knew this could be a suicide mission when we signed on. But we did it anyway, not because of Cerberus or because the Alliance doesn’t believe Shepard. We did it because we believe in Shepard and his mission._

_I regret nothing about accepting this mission except one thing. I’m leaving someone behind, and I may not be able to come back to her. Whatever happened I know you have to still care about Kora. I know she still cares about you. She doesn’t mention it as much as she used to but I can still see it in her eyes every once in a while. She’s never stopped caring about you and she probably never will. I was lucky to meet her and be with her for the time we had together. If we are blessed with more than I’m luckier than I deserve._

_I don’t want to leave her alone, but she said she understood why I had to go. It was like ripping my heart out when I finally had to leave for the Normandy’s deployment. I never wanted her to go through what she had again, but she said she understood. I know she did, but she deserves better and more._

_If I don’t come back I want you to look after her. She needs that. She won’t admit it, but she needs someone and as much as she loves me, she loves you more I think. Whatever your reasons for leaving her were, they were pretty f’ing stupid. You realize you left behind the best thing that ever happened to you right? If you didn’t then, I sure as hell hope you do now. You owe her so much and she owes you. But regardless of that, if you do get the chance to be with her again take it and hold on to it with both hands. Don’t you ever let her go again. And if I die and I find out you’ve f’ed up another chance with her, I’ll haunt you to your grave, Alenko._

_Get your damned head out of your ass and realize just how much you two need each other._

_I love Kora but I know and accept that I more than likely won’t make it back it her. This is your chance, Staff Cmdr. Don’t screw this up too._

_Good luck._

_Mike Westmore, Lt. Cmdr. SSV Normandy, SR2_

_P.S. Kora knows nothing about this letter. I sent her a completely different one but what you do now is up to you. Make a good choice. If we fail, it may be your last._

It had been months since he’d received the surprise letter. He had read it and re-read it more times than he could count. Westmore had hit on an old wound, one Kaidan had caused. One he had never truly recovered from.

Kora Reese was the one that got away. More accurately, he had let her get away thinking he was doing the right thing. Now a little over two years later, he knew for a fact he had been wrong. He had been an idiot. How could leaving her like he had been the best thing for either of them? It hadn’t been. He had been miserable for months after leaving her until he finally threw himself into his work again, ignoring that pain. But no matter what he did, it was still there.

No matter what he had accomplished in the meantime, the ranks he had risen to, the assignments he had taken on, the pain from that wound was still there. It always would be until he confronted it. He had never run from anything before except this. The hole in his heart he had created by forcing Kori away had never been filled. And now a dead man was calling his bluff.

Mike had been a good man just proud and more macho than Kaidan cared for. He’d been in a relationship with Kori for nearly a year before the O-4 Relay mission. But when he left, Westmore had at least been open and honest about his reasons. Kori would have understood and accepted that unlike how he had BSed his reasons for leaving.

Now he stood in his quarters typing up a report for Anderson on the progress his biotic students were making. He made sure to include a request for an in person briefing with the Admiral. It would require him to return to Earth and coincidentally would occur about the same time the SR2 was to be turned over the Alliance R & D. And the team overseeing that project was to be headed up by none other than Kora Reese.

Anderson had dropped her name in his last video call with Kaidan when he informed him of the pending arrest of Shepard after the Alpha Relay incident. The older man was once again hinting that Kaidan should patch things up with his one time flame. That combined with Westmore’s letter, made everything crystal clear.

Westmore was right. He had f’ed up and let go of the best thing that had ever happened to him. Westmore had died trying to protect humanity nearly six months before and had asked Kaidan to fix a mistake. It was the motivation he needed to end his own suffering. He had never thought that he would have the opportunity to make things right with Reese. Maybe he wouldn’t be able to but at least he could talk to her. He could try. Something he hadn’t done at all since the SR1 went down.

Now he found himself wanting to. Not just because of Westmore but because he realized just how much he had hurt Kori. He had always tried to bury that truth but now…

It all could end with just him trying to reach out to her and if he had to engineer an opportunity he would. She deserved better. She always had whether she believed it or not. And this time he would do it right. He would be honest and give her whatever closure she needed.

And maybe just maybe it wouldn’t just be an ending but also a beginning.

**Author's Note:**

> **title of the prompt series is taken from "M4 (part 2)" by Faunts from the Mass Effect OST (ME1)**


End file.
